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Posts tagged ‘relationship’

Devotion

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am here in London, adjusting to the changes that my life brings, in this case the return from ashram life to city life. I don’t know if anyone remembers that seminal track by Goldie – ’Inner City Life’? That more-or-less encapsulates how it feels.

When sitting down to write about a living master, one faces a dilemma: the sense that the living presence of such a being, and the ‘experience’ (for want of a better word) of that, can never be confined to words or descriptions. It’s very hard to say anything about Amma. She both is and is not, she manifests as both form and formless in a continuous cascade. Perhaps the way in which my friends and I feel her in the most tangible way, is as Supreme Love: a Love that goes completely beyond anything imaginable, and which cuts through every vestige of the human ego, revealing the ultimate secret of this universe. If anyone is asking why I spend so much time with my spiritual teacher, this is why.

I wish I could give some kind of account of my stay with Amma in Amritapuri, but that really would just be words. You see, it’s a living thing with her. You don’t go about your day and then sit down and write your diary, and feel all good about what you’ve understood, and then go to sleep again. It’s not like that. The path with Amma is the path of action, of expression, of interaction and of an outpouring of a selflessness you had no idea was inside you, waiting to come out. This Love moves, this Silence transforms without leaving itself. This true way throws the human being into complete Mystery, not only once, but constantly. And miracles rain down upon everyone in that ashram like the monsoons. I’m aware that I sound like I’ve drunk the Kool-Aid – lol!

Those of you who have visited the ashram will know that one of the ways people deepen in their closeness with Amma and her teachings, is through sharing stories about her. I heard many extraordinary accounts while I was there this time. One never knows whether such stories are true, mythological or a version of a truth. To me, that is not ultimately the most important thing: for me, it is this unknown space…this Mystery, that such stories deepen me into which matters the most. One night, we met a new friend. As we got to know him over the course of our stay on the ashram (in saying ‘we’ and ‘our’, I am referring to Steve and I – yes, we are back together 🙂 🙂 :-)), this friend began to tell us the story of how he met Amma. The story begins before he was born. His father heard about Amma and took my friend’s sister to meet Her in Manchester in 1989. When they went for Darshan the father said to his daughter, “You are in the presence of God, you can ask anything you like.” The daughter told Amma that she wanted a little brother. Amma looked to the father and asked if he and his wife wanted another child. The father replied Yes, but that they could not, because his wife had gone through the menopause. Amma said Ok, and smiled at the daughter. A couple of months later, the mother began her periods again. Soon after this, she was pregnant. My friend was born in due course. Not long after the birth, Amma was due to visit England again. The father stayed at home with his new son (my friend), while the mother – who had never met Amma yet – and her daughter went to the program. As the mother fell into Amma’s arms for Darshan, Amma said to this woman – who she was meeting for the first time and had no information about – “Are you happy now that you have a son?” The mother burst into tears and surrendered. Hearing this story flooded me with energy rushes and goosebumps. I would never want to, or try to, prove whether it is true or not. I don’t know that. All I can say is that the sense of resonance throughout my entire being upon hearing it was overwhelming, and that the feeling of reality, realness, hitting-the-mark – whatever you want to call it – opened up within me in a profound way.

This actually leads me into something else I wanted to share with you. People often ask me about intuition, and feel that I have some expertise in this area. I don’t know about that, but I did discover something more about the whole thing when I was with Amma in the ashram. I hope that including this diary entry might assist you in your own journey with with your sense of intuition / instinct.

12/9/18

The answer came in Darshan today. There was no need to tune-in, check, ‘ask Amma inside’, or anything like that. When I was relaxed and open – simple, and in my being, one could say – I felt during Amma’s long embrace that [X]. It didn’t come mentally. It didn’t come through any kind of asking. It didn’t come in a big bang. It came through the feeling body. This relative truth came as a sort-of feeling, a kind-of sense, which ran like a river through my heart. So, yes, as [Y] reminded me that time: trust the truth that comes naturally, like a gift.”

That’s all for now. If you would like to book a session or talk about anything, please call, message or text me.

Much Love,

xDaisy

Manifesting Intention Review

Hello 🙂

How are you? This email is a little late in coming to you, but I have finally had the chance to gather my thoughts from the last Vortex Healing training – Manifesting Intention – which I completed at the end of May.

Before I get started on that, I want to remind you that I am fortunate enough to be attending a silent meditation retreat with Adyashanti from tomorrow until the 18th August. This means absolutely no digital contact during that time.

Another reminder, as not everyone realises yet, I have the venue in Barbican back on Wednesdays, for those of you who cannot (or prefer not to) be treated at home. Distance sessions continue as normal. I have decided to keep my price the same, rather than raising, having looked into it with the support of Amma and Merlin (the Divine Being at the heart of Vortex Healing).

So, what do we mean by ‘Manifesting Intention’? Firstly, it’s important to explain that this has nothing to do with the plethora of techniques about getting what you want. This has to do with alignment and rooting inside Divinity, and then meeting that as it manifests through creation. One way of thinking about it is that it’s the Divine getting what it wants: you being the Divine at the deepest level of what you are, but certainly not on the level of ego or I or mine / me. Manifesting Intention is not about manifesting ‘my will’. As a healer, the difference between this and everything else we have in Vortex Healing is that I am going directly to Divine Intention at the point that it arises in creation, and channelling from there. We now use the term ‘re-manifesting’ instead of ‘transforming’ or ‘clearing’, because to heal what is being healed we are actually helping to re-manifest the Divinity from inside what is off. Now, of course, the manifesting of Divine Intention is happening all the time through all of creation. The transmission I have from this class helps you to align more deeply with that. In this way, it’s a healing and an awakening and an embodiment aid all at the same time. Pretty mind-blowing!

In class, we talked a lot about kidney energy. You will have noticed that I focus a lot there in almost every session, and now I have a way of channelling compressed Jing and Chi energies into the kidneys using MI (Manifesting Intention). I learned more about why this part of the body – and its resonance throughout the rest of the body – is so important. The Chi of the kidneys governs hormones – that’s a huge chunk of your body’s systems – and the kidney energy holds the toned-ness and strength of the whole body.

We also discussed gut health. These days there is a lot of talk about micro-biome and it was interesting to get Ric Weinman’s (teacher of the class and holder of the Vortex Healing lineage) opinion about this. He made the point that it’s not just about what we are eating, even though that is important. He believes that the health of the gut is a reflection of the health of the entire system. It reveals where a person is mentally, emotionally, karmically, genetically etc. Also, certain kinds of probiotics can actually be unhelpful (for example some can even exacerbate candida), so it is a good idea to tune in with your body before buying a probiotic. I tend to do this with all supplements anyway – and yes, you can even do this through the screen when shopping on Amazon 🙂 Simply feel from your body – perhaps with eyes closed to make it easier to see / sense – and experience whether your body wants that particular product or not.

With skin problems, Ric advised examining the liver. Essentially, when the liver is not functioning well, then the body is forced to detox it’s shit through the skin. He said that the toxicity comes from karmic (past life), genetic, emotional and food / environmental / physical factors and lifestyle stress combined.

And we have made a breakthrough in clearing chronic viruses such as Herpes and Epstein-Barr with Manifesting Intention. It is now possible to knock out most of these, even the very tricky Herpes!

See you after the retreat 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

Contemplation in the Sun

Hello 🙂

How are you?

First of all, I want to let you know that I will be in London on Wednesday this week in the Barbican. I need the rest of the week to sort out my housing situation in Brighton, which needs turning around within literally 7 days. Skype sessions are available though, of course.

I had one of those moments today, where I was between work (equine assisted therapy and a little job I do for a friend in London) and I stepped out into the sun in the garden where I was. I was immediately struck by the ordinary beauty of things. Simply the other buildings, the music from a party somewhere in the background, and the sky. Finally I could stop for a while, and I did. My mind began to chatter and then to fade, melting into my heart as often it does. It felt so good to feel, to be barefoot on the ground and to be able to loaf for an hour, with nothing to do! I felt so free… Silence pervaded completely. Eventually a thought came: What if I spent the rest of my life just being free? Something opened wider within, in this contemplation. I mean, what if any of us simply chose inner freedom, true peace, right now – and for every ‘now’ forever? I am well aware that this makes no sense in a way! But can you feel into what I’m saying? In other words, what if you, reading this right now, never ever left whatever realisation you have had about the true nature of what you are?

The next thought that came was, What would that take? I saw that it would require a willingness to relinquish all future plans. I also saw I would need to never leave what I know and to never believe or follow through on another thought / piece of negativity. It was humbling…to say the least.

Anyway, I wanted to share this exploration with you now, in hindsight, to see if you resonate with it or have perhaps had a similar kind of insight too? 🙂 Please do write with your comments on this.

Love,

xDaisy

London this week: today, Friday and Saturday

Hello,

How are you? A short note to say that for London sessions, today and Sat are now full this week. But there are a couple of spaces left on Friday. Distance sessions are always available of course, via Skype.

I also wanted to share this video with you. I never tire of Amma’s Swami Dayamrita. In particular it is his integrity, authenticity and humility which really touch me. They are rare qualities in people I have found. Let me know your feelings on this interview. Mine are very passionate!

SOULJOURNS – SWAMI DAYAMRITA, AMMA’S SENIOR DISCIPLE

SOULJOURNS – SWAMI DAYAMRITA, AMMA’S SENIOR DISCIPLE

Welcome to Souljourns and to the amazing story of a former atheist, a well educated man who came to know of Amma…

Much Love,

xDaisy

Self No Other

Hello,

How are you? I have had to wittle this group down due to technicalities with Yahoo, so I hope no one I’ve knocked off feels left out. I am thinking of you all with a warm and surrendered heart and wondering where life is taking you… Please do write with your stories – they are always welcome 🙂

Thank you to those of you who responded to my last email; I feel your warmth and compassion. I know some of you have been concerned and wondering how I am, so I thought I’d fill you in a little and update you on this process, hopefully in a way that speaks to you and your process too. What I am going through in its deepest essence at the moment is heartbreak. I’m sure many of you have been through this too. So unexpected and so very deep, yet at least I know I have loved fully. I have heard some people say to me that they have never been in love before, even people who are quite a lot older than I am, and (perhaps) that is saddest of all.

The process has been that through fully embracing this heartbreak, as much as I am able in my fragile humanness, there is a continuing kind of breakdown breakthrough and entering into Divinity. I want to credit here my sadhana practice, Amma, Adyashanti and Vortex Healing and the engagement in these. There was also a sudden breakthrough during a group healing I was lucky enough to be part of – many thanks Chetana and Will Thornton. I was amazed at the turnaround and transformation after receiving this healing – almost like night and day – and the subsequent sense of completely withdrawing into the Self. Here is what I wrote about it in an email afterwards:-

“I just want to share that something has completely left me since this healing. Now I feel as if there is only the Self itself, and that’s all. It’s like nothingness, but not that empty feeling of emotional vacuum at all. It’s devoid of noise, there is only Silence. Grounded in Self now.”

In my diary I reflected further:-

“So this is it. It was always here. Right here… No wonder no one could give it to me. What this is could never be bought nor sold. ‘The peace which surpasses all understanding’, now I know You. Now I know You… You are this – are me. It’s not outside, it never was outside.”

When I arose the following morning, I knew I had to move home to Brighton. It’s funny because I have just remembered in writing this, that Eckhart Tolle once said one day he simply knew he had to move to North America. Moving as Self, it’s not a question of working things out. It’s letting go without end.

I will be coming to London every week to see you for sessions, so please don’t worry about that. I expect I will move around the beginning of April. Please do not hesitate to email or call me if you have any questions about this.

With Love in my heart,

xDaisy

Silent Meditation Retreat with Adyashanti

Hello,

I must say I am thrilled to have the opportunity to deepen into this great, deep silence……….who knows what will happen in this great adventure into the unknown? The inner dive, swan dive, into mystery. I will be unavailable in communication – on a silent meditation retreat – from tomorrow until the 22nd Aug, when I will be back in action.

I want to share a few more learnings from the Ammathon (as a friend rightly called it!), which I hope will benefit you. During the program in Toronto, Amma said something which really struck me. She said, “Vasanas have no power of their own. It is we who give them power.” I realised in that moment, how powerless negativity really is. Her statement also cut through, in me, the tendency to become so familiar with something, that I begin to misuse it. What I mean is that I have talked about my ‘vasanas’ (latent negative tendencies) or issues or behaviour so many times, I can forget that it is I myself who permits them to have the power they have and who actually gives that power to them. I thought this could strike a chord for many of you as well. I would add that it is our tendency to identify with such internal arisings, which is the mechanism by which we give them the most power.

The most core life story I had, the one which had most coloured my experience of reality in this lifetime, came up during the last couple of days with Amma. We save the best for last, don’t we? For me, that was the love story – the agony and the ecstasy of romantic love, and underlying that, the nagging feeling that the right relationship would fulfil me and close any remaining ‘gap’. This probably sounds familiar to some of you, perhaps to many of you. I know – it’s a hard one to admit! I am not going to share the private details of that, sorry 😉 But please bear with me anyway. There is something more important than that part of the story. It began on the treadmill, of all places, not somewhere I frequently find myself. But going to the gym occasionally, during the tour, helped me get time by myself (which is almost completely impossible on staff) and helped me move energetics that were stuck. Suddenly on this treadmill, the desire to be free of that core story hit me, like never before. I simply HAD to be free of it; I could carry it all no more. So with this fire, I made a silent cry – a prayer – within, to Amma. With that, I let go, knowing that it could go either way: perhaps I would get free of this pattern, perhaps I would not – it was in the hands of Divinity now.

Shortly after this, Amma did a Q&A with the retreat group outside, in the unseasonably hot evening sun. There were only about 500 of us there. Right from the beginning, I felt a large amount of fear and anxiety coursing through my system, to the point where I could barely sit still. I didn’t know why I was feeling this way, it was like a body thing. I decided to focus more intensely on the question that was happening, and on Amma’s answer. As I looked at Amma, she made a certain movement as she talked with her hands, and with that I was gone. I felt as if I was merging into Amma from where I was – it was part-visual, part-kinesthetic (akin to the way I sense, during a session). As this happened, any remaining sense of separation fell away and I began to cry. In this oneness and tears and the whole un-conveyable experience, I suddenly knew that all my desire, lack and longing for this person – and all women and men who I had ever felt that towards – was really the longing for God. I simply knew it. Not as a concept and not as a philosophy, and not as an excuse. I actually saw it. I saw it in such a way, that it felt like I could never actually un-see it. I also sensed intuitively that all my other desires were also the longing for God. I felt freed at last…….truly, truly free.

(NB God in my perception is also Truth, wholeness, unity, oneness etc.) The next thoughts were, “Why have I been running after men and women all this time?” and “How could I have missed this reality all these years?” Then the strangest thing happened: I experienced depression for the first time in my life. As I sat, purposefully alone, eating dinner, I felt depressed. But there was absolutely no resistance to it. The sense of oneness was so broad and pervasive, that there was absolutely no problem with feeling depressed. In fact, I was pleased to be having the experience, because before that I never understood what depression was. I knew what pain was, deep gruelling emotional pain, but I didn’t know depression until that moment. I then experienced suicidal ideation! But again, there was no problem with this either, because there was zero resistance to it. And it existed in a context of oneness, of Love. After about an hour, both of these so-called negative experiences passed of their own accord, without me doing anything at all about them.

In hindsight, I believe they occurred because my ego had just lost its trump card, which was the core love story drama. With that gone, it seems like it had to play the depression and suicide cards to try to regain ‘control’ of my bodymind. But that didn’t work: these feelings and thoughts simply passed through, as I said. So then I was just there: story-less and One, feeling a sense of ordinariness and freedom. Nothing special, yet complete liberation.

I make my newsletters personal because I don’t believe I can help unless I talk from my own direct experience. I hope that by reading this something may have resonated or sparked for you.

See you soon, after the retreat,

Love,

xDaisy

Why Amma?

Hello,

How are you Londoners and people of the world? 🙂 I hope if you are in London that you are enjoying this heat wave we are lucky enough to be having 🙂

I want to address a question today which people often ask me, or ask me without words. Why Amma? Why do I do this? Why go and pay a handsome fee to work without pay, under conditions which some would consider harsh?

The answer is simple: it’s love. I look at Amma, and I love her. The depth of that love makes me want to support her work, serve Embracing the World (her global charity), and beyond that, to serve life in its entirety. For me, it’s passion; it’s not a ‘being good’ thing. It’s not even spiritual. Imagine being in love…now times it by 500…that’s nowhere near it. This is bhakti (devotion) in real terms.

Everyone has their own particular relationship with Amma, and certainly Amma devotees are all there for different reasons. Some of my friends, clients and family feel put off by the culty appearance of it all, by some of the devotees (who can be far from loving) and by the pretentious ‘holier than thou’ dynamics. Those of you who know me even a little bit, know I am definitely not the poster girl for holiness 🙂 No; it’s a love thing. Pure and simple.

So, what were the physical realities of being on volunteer tour staff, you may wonder. In my particular seva, we were working around 14 hours per day (every day) and longer on a Devi Bhava (the all-nighter). We got roughly 5 hours sleep per night, on the floor, sharing a room and bathroom with between 6 and 40 women. Then, after the long Devi Bhava, we would get on a coach and travel to the next city. Some of those journeys were over 22 hours long. When we arrived, we would sometimes get only a few hours sleep before set-up and work began. We delivered programs in 10 cities, over a 6-week period.

In between all this, I would squeeze my way onto the stage to spend time with Amma. Occasionally, Amma would call the staff to receive Darshan. I would like to share with you my diary entry about this:-

6/6/16

I don’t know how possible it is to put this into words…

Impossible.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

But let me try.

Amma called us for Darshan in Seattle on Devi Bhava. As I entered the stage in the queue, I decided to make a prayer within. I said something like, ‘Amma, please assist me in focussing on the goal of this life: on realising God. Please help me to remain focussed even during this tour.’

As I laid my eyes upon her, hugging the person in front, tears welled up. I felt this love for her that was beyond anything I had ever experienced, and yet ordinarily human at the same time. I simply rejoiced within, at the sight of her. She moved my head around quite a bit before finally placing it on her heart, while she answered the questions of some devotees to her right. It always amazes me how one never feels left out in this scenario: Amma’s attention is deeply with each one of us simultaneously, which is testament to the sheer depth of oneness she is living. She then kissed my cheek and embraced me, chanting in my ear with a kind of vehemence in her voice, “My daughter! My daughter! My daughter!”, over and over again. I fell into total oneness…….. At the same time, the human being felt her as my teacher and as my mother – somewhere where those two are one and the same. And the experience of trust was overwhelming. As Amma finished the hug and handed me prasad, we drew back from one another and she looked deeply into my eyes. I cannot adequately express in words what I felt pass between us in that exchange: it was simply beyond the beyond. I then felt deep gratitude and expressed it somehow from oneness. Amma’s expression altered to one of such profound compassion….…something just too immense to convey. She embraced me again and then placed a chocolate in my mouth. That was the moment at which my searching gently stopped. My life’s search ceased in that moment. It was, perhaps, what many teachers have described as the end of seeking. Immediately after this I experienced true happiness: powerful, pure, authentic, unconditional happiness. I felt restored, redeemed – completely. There was total and utter wholeness. I’m not talking conceptually here, but actually. The real thing.

As I walked away, I collapsed on the stage in tears beside Amma. I was crying, and then I was sobbing; there was no way to do anything at all, and I couldn’t stop. But I was actually sobbing with happiness. My heart broke open under a force: that of revelation, unconditional happiness, union…Truth. Simultaneously, I experienced a spontaneous healing of my past, which came from nowhere. Dad’s death, the break-ups, the childhood trauma, the fear, isolation, despair, loss, loneliness, lack and doubt – all of these were consumed by something I cannot describe. I cried and cried, wiping my make-up from my face with my sleeve, only to cry uncontrollably again.

When the crying eventually stopped, I sat for a while. When I left the stage, I felt empty in the true sense of the word. Emptied of separation, of that heavy anxious burden. And the very subtle sense that something is missing, was gone. I could rest…finally, I could rest…… The feeling of resting and oneness were beautiful……profound. Paradoxically, there was an abundant feeling of vitality at the same time. But it was vitality without ownership. I realised that rest and vitality are the same thing. Eventually I went about the day, without saying a word about it to anyone.”

I hope you enjoy your day and that I get to see you soon 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

The Significance of Following Your Intuition

Hello,

Happy New Year 🙂

I want to talk about something while I am in this ‘place’ as it were. Do you know how it is when you follow your intuition, including speaking that, even though it takes so much courage and it goes against your conditioned reflexes?

When I do this, as I did today, it is as if there is an atmosphere which fills the whole room or space…and the truth leaves a wake, waves which carry on. Yet everything is totally still, silent in its essence, and real. It is as if I am touching the depth of life itself, right here in my bedroom. Nothing and everything exists within this, and there is no ‘outside’ or ‘inside’. Simultaneously, my body quivers with the felt sense of oneness – like rushes down my legs and down through my crown. Perhaps this is where the absolute and the humanness meet?

To give the ‘story’ part of this, I would have to share something which I know the person involved would not want me to share. It is not one of you, but it feels wrong to detail this. Sorry to be vague.

On a different note, you will be pleased to hear that I received this from Ric recently:-

“This morning there was an upgrade to the U-AP and a major upgrade to the Protocol. My sense is that you will be able, when working through the Protocol for issues, to move at least twice as much in the same time frame, and deeper. Happy New Year!” (Ric Weinman)

The difference is palpable, so do get in contact if you would like to experience it. That’s all for now, as I can’t write more from this silence at the moment. I look forward to hearing from you though 🙂

Love,

Daisy

Oneness

Hello,

I am excited to share with you that through processing what I talked about in my last email, my healing sessions have changed. I noticed that in the session I just gave, there was a new kind of  natural bridging as oneness. The client felt this too and said, “It was amazing”. I want to credit Amma, the wonderful healers who have helped me through, my therapist and my friends. I have learned a lot from you.

One thing I did for myself during this time (and I believe would be of huge help to many of you) is disentangling myself from the karmic field of my parents. This is done first for Mum and then for Dad. As children, we merge our karmic field with theirs, causing us to carry a lot of stuff which isn’t really ours. Releasing this creates a deep silence in your energy field and whole system. For me, it was as if lots of voices suddenly stopped talking around me.

There is also a new way to clear conflict in relationships: by using Merlin’s Grace to ‘clear anything that is negatively impacting the relationships, on all dimensions of the astral’. It only takes 5-8 minutes or so.

Hot news on the Vortex scene is the ‘spot of non-existence’. Here is what Ric has to say about these: “these can look like black holes on the outside but a black hole is where the emotional pain has contracted all the vital weblines there into a tight, dense spot that has no movement or light within it. But imagine that pain going even deeper, so that it wants to cease to exist, and that desire literally sucks the life out of the vital weblines. My guess is that about 1 in 17 people has one of these. And if you have one and it has been treated as if it were a black hole, then it is still there. And it is easy enough to find out: channel ReplW [get me to do this for you] for your spot of non-existence and see if anything starts to happen and stays happening.” It would take about one session to clear this. My friends and clients who have had this removed are raving about it.

As regards this Bank Holiday, I will not be able to offer my usual half-price day because I will be spending time with my family to mark my Dad’s death three years ago. However, fear not, because there are two Bank Holidays coming up very soon, the first of which is on the 5th May (I will write with details nearer the time).

Looking forward to seeing you for awakening and healing fun!

Best wishes,

Daisy

Happy New Year

Hello,

Happy New Year to all of you. I hope you had some wonderful celebrations on NYE and have recovered fresh for 2014. However, if that seems like a faraway dream, you know where I am. This can sometimes be a difficult time of year for some people. Even if it is just for a short chat, I am here.

Thank you to those who participated in the recent new year sale. I am feeling very inspired by you all at the moment. Seeing how you are opening into the willingness to die into the unknown and wake up from the dream of separation is a joy to behold. Really, it is an honour to be part of that. Sometimes I feel like I have the best job in the world.

More and more I am seeing how the talking part of the session is much more than just talking. There is so much going on in that beginning part of a session, and in another way so little – because there is only awareness. I think you know what I mean 😉 The channelling part of the healing sometimes feels like the follow-through, rather than the be-all-and-end-all I used to think of it as.

There is something new which can be done for places (like an organ) where emotional energy has become compressed and toxic, causing physical problems. In fact, if you have a physical issue, this is often what is happening. I use Merlin’s Grace to ‘clear the energetic body interface to the [insert organ etc.]’. It takes about 1 & 1/2 hours and can be done in person, but not at a distance (sorry internationalites!). This is a really good release for the kidneys, which carry so much fear/survival energy and also control the energy of the body overall and it’s temperature (according to Chinese medicine and other modalities). Let me know if this appeals to you.

All that’s left to say is that I feel a lot of love for you all and for this journey into Self which we are all making. As you know, I have had my challenges this year, not least the break-up with Sarah 2 & 1/2 months ago. So I am feeling a lot and experiencing the roller coaster of life at the moment. Yet in spite of this, I still feel awake and aware. Well, most of the time anyway! Ric pointed out to me that it is really a matter of what one pays attention. I hope that is a help to you also. Take care and see you soon,

Love,

xDaisy

The Core Emotional Position You Entered This Life With

Hello,

I have been having fun helping you to release the core emotional position you entered this life with, using the Merlin’s Grace transmission and healing protocol. Let’s call that emotional position, ‘Z’. The nature of Z would have put you in a particular family situation to match it, and you would have created new dramas with your parents, with Z as the background for those dramas. Later, other life dramas would be created, all with Z as their foundation. But here is the key: each of those new life dramas will have its own stream of history connected with particular people. Most likely you define your issues as what you see in your life, which is likely to be with spouses, boyfriends & girlfriends, and especially with parents. You don’t tend to point to Z because it has become camouflaged within all these other issues. 

I am half-way through releasing this in myself and in many of you. It goes to show that what you think is your problem in this life is often a cover for the real ‘problem’. As you experience healing in this issue, you tend to get a deeper insight into that core position that never wanted to budge, but now is. Not only can that give a huge release and relief but it also joins up the dots of your life in ways you wouldn’t have imagined possible before.

I learned an interesting fact through my drug & alcohol training for my volunteer placements at outreach projects (a part of my degree in Person-Centred Counselling). 80% of thoughts are negative in nature. That might explain a lot! But the reason for this goes back to hunter-gatherer days, when this mechanism of negative thinking meant that the men and women of that era kept on improving on the ways they were completing practical tasks, spurred on my such thoughts. Nowadays, this kind of thinking of has become toxic for many people for a variety of reasons, but it is comforting to know that there was actually a piece of good design in there originally.

A reminder that I will be here and available over the Christmas period. The days I will not be working are Christmas Day and Boxing Day, and then New Year’s Day. You may wish to give a session as a present: I can send you a voucher for this if so, please just email me.

And to clarify, since some of you have been surprised about this and got mixed up (understandably), yes – Sarah and I have split up. It has been almost two months now and it is only really beginning to hit me. The pain is very deep and it is a whole life change for me. However, as I said before, please do not stay away because of this. Working with you is helping me and strangely enough, the sessions I am able to facilitate now are oftentimes deeper than they were before.

I look forward to our next session together,

Love,

xDaisy

Amma in Berlin

Hello,

I have now done 3 stops on the Europe tour (incl. London), because I can’t go to Amritapuri this year. The stop before Milan for me was Berlin. I must say, what a fabulous city! I never thought I would hear myself say this, but London is no longer the place with the best music in the world – Berlin has overtaken us. Everywhere we went we heard such excellent house music, really tech-y stuff, and also fantastic dub step etc. Impressive.

Anyway, most of the time I spent blissfully with Amma. The German people were lovely and everything had been done so nicely – almost to the point of perfection. There was no cheering and clapping after each bhajan etc. (like in Italy) but people were quiet and respectful and that was appreciated in the chaos that is an Amma tour 🙂

One evening, Amma was soon to finish darshan (due to the curfew in the hall) and as usual I was sitting on the stage watching her and going in and out of meditation. Suddenly she looked at us all and began talking in Malayalam. Br. Shubamrita translated: “Amma says she is sorry that the darshans have to go so fast. It was not like this years ago. Amma says that in the olden days nobody had a watch but everybody had time; these days everybody has a watch but nobody has time”. Many people started to cry upon hearing this. That Amma would apologise for not giving even more than she already does was moving. And what a lesson in such a simple way from a true master: it seems that everything Amma ever says has a tapestry of meanings woven into it.

On the Devi Bhava I somehow managed to get to the front of the queue with a timecard from the previous day. It was my Birthday, so I felt very privileged. Then I was seated RIGHT IN FRONT of Amma’s chair! I honestly couldn’t believe it. When she walked in, the power was so huge that I stepped backwards and nearly fell over my chair. It was like being “hemmed in” by Truth, as Adyashanti says. But I noted how strange it is that I say I want Truth, but when it comes I step backwards away from it.

I was also one of the first people to receive Amma’s darshan. I didn’t say it was my Birthday (which apparently you can do and you get a lovely Birthday darshan) because I was praying intensely in the darshan line. The helpers asked me my language and I said “English”. My prayer was, “Amma help me step towards you. I don’t want to step away from Truth anymore. There is so much fear within me but I really want the Truth. Please bring me closer to you”. When I was in front of Amma, Geeta (Amma’s darshan assistant) said to me, “You don’t speak any other languages?”. I was surprised because she knows me; I replied, “No” and she said, “Only Polish”. Before I had time to correct her, Amma had taken me! Amma hugged me and then looked at me and hugged me again. In my ear she chanted in German “Meine Liebe”. Then she motioned to the left of her chair and said “Come around”. I was so overcome I had to ask her, “Come around?” and she motioned again. I felt so blessed… What a Birthday darshan! I couldn’t walk properly when I stood up. When I could, I sat there with her absorbing the darshan for an hour or so.

But I didn’t know what the German words meant which she had said to me. So I asked my German friend. She said, it means “My Love”. I was floored… For 12 years, Amma has said to me, “My daughter”. For a moment, my blood ran cold. I knew that amongst other meanings, this had a deeper significance regarding my relationship with Sarah. I will explain all in the next review.

I want to acknowledge those who recently took the Core Veil Vortex Healing class. Whooppeee! I hope you had some deep experiences – do let me know what yours were. And I wanted to remind you that I will be here over the Christmas holidays, which is often an important time for healing,

Love,
xDaisy

Marlies Cocheret THIS WEDNESDAY in London

Hello,

Well…the retreat was truly wonderful. I cannot write much about it now as I am still digesting it, but I will do next Monday.

GREAT NEWS: there may still be spaces on Marlies’s Women’s Day this Wednesday in Belgravia (near Victoria station). It runs from 9 30am til 5pm and you can apply by emailing her directly: marliescocheret@yahoo.com. Details are in the following link:-

http://www.marliescocheret.com/PDF/The%20Way%20of%20Woman%20London2013.pdf

I have nothing else to say right now, but I wanted to make contact with you. When I go away I often think of you, particularly when I am in spiritual community. I hope you are doing well and more than that diving into what you are,

Love,

xDaisy

Re-assemble to Harmonise Your Life

Hello,

The weather is still here – Yey! Sorry, just had to say that! 🙂 I hope you are getting time and space to enjoy it.

I have been thoroughly enjoying working on the Assemblage Point. It is VERY powerful work and certainly the deepest work we can now do in Vortex Healing. As I mentioned, it even clears deep rooted identities (such as the Incarnational Identity of the issue at hand) for those without a Core Veil. And for those with one, these IDs become far easier to release afterwards.

So, what are the results? In my own system, I have noticed big shifts in my relationships as a result of working this way. And this also seems to be the case with those of you I have worked on. One of you managed to become clear about a difficult relationship AND began to leave it after only one session of this work. Others of you have reported that you feel your life has changed completely afterwards. Really fantastic stuff.

This weekend I have the privilege of being part of a retreat with Marlies Cocheret in Sussex. Here she is talking on YouTube if you are not yet familiar with her:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wm5oB3cB_Zw

As a result, the next review will be on Monday. I look forward to sharing with you again then. In the meantime, please do send me your stories, because I enjoy them 🙂 It’s kind of like eating. Ok, enjoy and bye for now,

Love,

xDaisy

The Power of Sangha

Hello,

This week I have been reminded of the power of sangha: the natural focus in Truth which takes place when you are in the company of friends who are also functioning from beingness.

It’s not that beingness needs this as such, or that it gets created by any particular situation, more that it is simply a joy to remind one another of what it means to live the awakened life by being together.

I also wanted to say that I know I haven’t been ringing as much as I usually do. This is because my degree is at a busy phase. I have started placements and therefore have been travelling a lot and doing mad things like learning about needle exchange as a part of substance misuse training. So I don’t have as much time as I used to at the moment. But I do care and welcome any incoming calls!

Don’t forget your Bank Holiday session those of you who have signed up. I am really looking forward to Monday and hope you are too 🙂

Enjoy your long weekend,

Love,

xDaisy

Mother Meera and Awakening to 0-Self

Hello,

How are you? It feels like a long time since I have written to you as I have been taking the Vortex Healing® class ‘Awakening to 0-Self’ and seeing Mother Meera in London.

Did any of you make it? I saw one or two of you there and would love to hear about your experience.

Mine was the experience of coming into alignment with what I am really here for and then resting in the knowing of that. My first darshan involved my offering a prayer to Mother Meera in my heart and then feeling the answer come straight away when she gazed into my eyes (as is the way of her darshan). The second darshan was more like resting in this knowingness within, seeing the reflection of that in her eyes. We are INCREDIBLY lucky to live in times when we can visit these mahatmas (great souls), who are in the deepest enlightenment and to meet with them in that as far as we are able to go. In the past there was Jesus and Neem Karoli Baba etc., now we have Amma, Mother Meera and Karunamayi. I just feel so amazed that this is possible – that we can simply visit them!

The ‘Awakening to 0-Self’ class was both an experience of deepening into embodiment of Truth and also awakening to a new sense of Truth which I was unaware of. Very profound and moving at times and also feeling that I came home into my body and out of denial of things that were not in alignment with my deepest and truest desire. In awakening we both are freedom itself and ALSO we are free enough to see the aspects of ourselves that are not free.

So, how does this benefit you?, you may be thinking. Ric discussed this in class, which I was very interested to hear. He said that as each of us moves deeper into awakening, so the power which we can bring to healing is greater. What amuses me about this is that once again I am reminded that thereis huge benefit to awakening, but not for me – not for the ego 🙂

I am currently reading a book that is so good, I would say it is the only book I have ever needed to read about enlightenment. I was given it as an e-book, so please let me know if you would like to receive a copy and I will email it to you. It is Adyashanti’s new book – “The Way of Liberation”.

And finally…after a session this week I was told something by one of you that I simply must share since it was so moving and deeply appreciated by me. I was told that I “went beyond the call of duty”. Well, there is certainly enough ego left here to enjoy that one. Thank you 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

Hello from Amma’s in Paris

Hello 🙂
Apologies for the lateness of this
newsletter. I am in Paris
with Amma at the moment.
We are just outside the city,
in a pretty and peaceful suburb
called Cergy.
I will return tomorrow
(Sunday) and look forward to
seeing many of you at Amma’s
program in London, where you can
find me in the massage area.
If you have never met Amma,
here is a little introduction from
the funny and engaging
Louis Theroux:-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yf_vGArzIbE
I want to share a few experiences
I have had since being here.
For me, it is often during bhajans
(devotional singing) that the most
powerful in-body insights are
received.
At one point, Amma cried out so
intensely to God during one
such bhajan, that I felt a
ball of energy come hurtling
into my heart and I fell into bliss.
In that state, I realised that
giving and receiving are the
same thing – there is literally
no difference between them.
Later during Amma’s set,
 I began to feel grief and
sadness arising. I realised
that this was not actually
coming from me and as I looked
for the root I sensed it
coming in from Sarah and
into my heart.
If I sat as beingness, open,
the grief got transformed through
my heart and body. If I went
into mind/thinking, the process
stopped. Amma was showing
me very clearly how to work
with people in a
more effective way.
And simultaneously
this spelled out for me the deeper
significance of awakening.
That it really isn’t about me,
rather it is meant to serve the whole
of life and alleviate suffering.
These are all things that one can
‘know’ and they may sound
very basic, but it is quite
another thing to actually feel,
experience and realise them.
You may be pleased to hear
that apparently Amma is
beginning to discourage people
from wearing white. I think she
doesn’t want the organisation to
be seen as some kind of cult.
See you soon and
please send me your stories,
Love and Love and Love,
xDaisy

The Greatest Love of All

Hello 🙂
How are you?
This week I have been
contemplating the high
value we as a society places
on being in relationship.
Don’t get me wrong –
I love relationships as much
as the next girl or guy.
But the fulfilment we are
secretly seeking there
can’t be found in them –
cannot be found in an-other.
When a deeper love is
embraced, which can
most easily be experienced
as silence, the inner guru,
oneness, whatever name
you choose – you
come directly into total
fulfilment right now.
No more waiting for ‘the one’!
The one is what you ARE –
not what you think you are,
not what you feel you are,
and not what you are
searching for.
What you actually ARE, underneath
all the noise and distraction.
THAT is the Love you seek.
I came across this most inspiring
interview on the subject,
which I am so happy to be
able to share with you:-
Just to remind you, I will
shortly be going away to
further my training in
Vortex Healing:
28th May – 8th June
Have a lovely weekend,
Love,
xDaisy