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Posts tagged ‘one’

Why Breaking Up Is Sometimes Good

Hello 🙂

How are you? I have quite a lot to tell you today. Firstly, who came to Amma? And how was it, if you did? One of you summed up her first experience with Amma in such a beautiful way that I want to share it. She said, “I’m just completely blown away by her. It’s the highest level of love. How lucky are we to be in her presence.” And that’s it.

I found this part of Amma’s speech particularly inspiring. Amma said that anger is the only thing that can truly defeat us; whereas patience is true victory. She pointed out that there are numerous things each day which can cause us to get angry. But when we do, we actually empower that situation or person to control our mind. Amma compared projecting anger at someone with grabbing a burning ember and throwing it at them: we get burned first, before burning the other person.

As you may have guessed from the title of this newsletter, Steve Vieau and I’s awakened relationship has come to its final end. It happened on the 15th October, hence my recent silence and withdrawal. I don’t feel that it is necessarily appropriate to share details about how the break-up happened. But I will say that it was deeply shocking, almost like experiencing trauma or PTSD. After that, it was excruciatingly painful and devastating for me, because he is the love of my life. The pain was beyond words, unbearable loss – almost as if I was losing Amma – which plunged me into literally the deepest darkness of my life. Thank goodness I was then miraculously with Amma in person. After what She transmitted to me, I am now beginning to experience the ending of Steve and I’s relationship as a healthy and powerful hit to my ego: a way for the Divine to completely destroy what is untrue inside, and create transformation. The whole thing is gradually becoming sobering, humbling and liberating. Which is why I chose the title I did for this newsletter today. Thank you to all those who rode the rollercoaster of the past two years with us, supporting us in our journey together. I also want to express how much solace and love I am finding in the Divine, in my friends and in all of you: my work is even more precious to me at this time.

There is an opportunity to learn Amma’s incredible IAM Technique on the 23rd and also to be with Br. Shubamrita (Amma’s senior disciple) on the 30th. Please contact me for further details about these events at MA Centre UK (Amma’s Bromley ashram).

 

A note to please correspond with me via WhatsApp, Messenger, phonecall or text for a swift response – i.e., not email. For hopefully obvious reasons, I have deactivated my Facebook account, so please don’t think that I have blocked or de-friended you if we were connected on there. FB Messenger still works fine.

Love,

xDaisy

Divine Doors

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am rejoicing in learning today 🙂 I learned so much from listening to Anthony Gorman on the Vortex Healing classes I took with him recently, here in London. One thing was a completely new way of looking at bridging (not sensing, but rather the connection from me to you which allows Divine energy to penetrate deeply into your system). The aspect of bridging that I knew most about, is a manner of connecting with you as oneness. And then it’s as if I create rivers through which the Divine energies pour and move themselves into you. But Anthony explained another side of bridging, which I had thought about less. He said that what makes us better bridges (and more “qualified” – to use his word – as healers to address issues in you), is actually what we have survived and worked through ourselves. I find this profound… I always had a slight inkling that my own life experiences were designed in some mysterious way for the service of others, but I hadn’t heard this spoken out loud before.

To follow on from what I wrote about the EarthWorks classes I attended recently, I wanted to mention that I can make a Divine Guidance Door into an object for you, as part of a session. This helps you with your own sensing and seeing from Truth. It takes about 15mins – like a regular Divine Door. You can sit with the object, or ask questions if that is more natural to you. For example, I made one for myself in a small rose quartz crystal. Other possibilities include an Angelic Divine Door. Believe it or not, I have one of those in my trainers! Nature Divine Doors are also available.

Here is the link for Amma’s Europe Tour. She will be in Surrey on the 1st and 2nd Nov. It’s free, it’s a party – what’s not to like? 🙂 Please let me know via message or call if you need any information about the event of the year 🙂 It’s also really cool to see her in another city if you can: you get more space and time to just be with Amma, when it isn’t your home city.

https://amma.org/meeting-amma/europe

I will be at Marlies Cocheret in London on Fri 4th Oct and Sat 5th Oct, so please join me if you can (flyer attached). Booking is important for this.

On the 6th Oct, there is the Official Opening Day of the MA Centre UK (Amma’s ashram), which is in Bromley. It’s free, but advisable to book your place:-

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/ma-centre-opening-celebration-tickets-71802686769

Please note (as some people are not aware) that I need 24hrs notice to change or cancel a session, otherwise the session will be charged at the normal rate.

See you soon,

Much Love,

xDaisy

 

Where does happiness lie?

Hello 🙂

How are you?

It is possible to have been on a spiritual path or an awakening path for many years, yet still hold on to secret drives, particularly regarding happiness. Even though all of this can easily be spiritualised of course 😉 So, where does happiness really lie? I would love to receive your feelings and ideas about this, so please do write to me if you feel to.

I suppose the way this question got answered for me, wasn’t so much by asking the question and then analysing: it came in a different way. It was more a case of something which was there before, falling away – and noticing what was gone. One day, I went to Amma’s ashram in London to do seva. Before beginning the seva, there was a satsang (literally meaning, meeting in truth). I don’t know why on that day I had such a profound realisation, since I do many of those satsang practices every day, and have done for years. As I was chanting Archana (the 1000 Names of the Divine Mother), I was staring at Amma’s picture on the altar in front of us all. Suddenly something hit me like a flash : the source of happiness lies within me. It was quite a shock, and yet so evident and in a way, obvious, even though this whole thing was very subtle. Then a cascade of insights followed, such as the fact that happiness is never going to be found in a man, or in a partnership, in having a child, or in anything external. And also, I realised that the words ‘happiness is a choice’ (as Amma has said many times) are actually true. I realised that I am not “going to find it” in a relationship, I am not “going to find it” ‘one day’. Happiness is here, now! Happiness is already here, before I begin looking for it. On the level of thought, it was like, “Wow! Happiness is nowhere outside me.”

A reminder of timing and prices, as some people have not received these:-

All sessions are 1 & 1/4 hrs

In-person (in your home) = £100

Barbican venue (most Wednesdays) = £90

Distance healing (via WhatsApp, Skype etc.) = £75

I’d also like to inform you of some dates I will be away: I have very recently decided to visit Amma in Toronto, 12th – 22nd July. I will take that time off for sadhana (spiritual practices), self-care and seva (selfless service). Therefore please plan your sessions accordingly, and message me if you would like to book.

I hope this email finds you well and enjoying the warmth 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

The Power of Practice

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am well. I have recently been contemplating the power of regular rooted spiritual practice. I suppose for me I could say that this is the most important part of my day. That is kind-of a hard thing to say, because for me now the whole of life is equally important, in all its apparent parts. Nevertheless, there is something about getting up in the morning and doing an intentional practice that really moves me. What is your experience with this? I would love to hear your feelings and experiences.

In my experience so far, at all ‘stages’ along the awakening embodiment evolution daily sadhana (spiritual practice) is deeply important, precious and so delightful! I often want to sing about it after doing it! Luckily this is welcome in my household, since my housemates are on a level 🙂 What I feel about sadhana is that it has an immense multitude of simultaneous benefits. It both provides a structure for the day and frees one from all ‘imposed’ structures. It brings joy to the heart and radiates joy out to others. It ignites the innate (and often suppressed) longing for Divinity, whilst satisfying it at the same time. It transforms sexual energy. Most of all, sadhana is an expression of rootedness in Divinity (which is within every being). And it aligns one with the Divine, so to speak, in ever deeper and more mysterious ways.

The way I approach the question of which kind of practice to do, is simply to do what I am truly drawn to in a natural and organic way. I think this is important because, first of all, we tend to do what we love. Secondly, we are only likely to continue in the rigorous discipline of a daily sadhana if we actually feel inspired by that practice in the first place. I am not a fan of imposed spiritual practices, or of doing what others do and hoping for the best.

Perhaps it is more about the passion and the open willingness which we bring to the practice, rather than what the practice itself is (within reason). And then that passion and that willingness (which are really the fire of awakeness inside us) eventually lead us to the next appropriate practice for us, or even to no practice at all, or directly into the ocean of Divinity which has always been right on our own doorstep. I would really love to hear of what you do, if you are drawn to a regular sadhana of any kind.

Ultimately, every one of our lives (so-called ‘spiritual’ or otherwise) is shaped by the extent to which we are rooted in reality / love / spirit / truth / divinity / mystery. And that is not confined to anything, or to dependency upon anything. Even upon sadhana. I am simply intending, here, to share my passionate enthusiasm for sadhana, and to illuminate a valuable way of assisting the rootedness in Divinity, which can sometimes seem elusive in daily life.

See you soon,

Love and Peace,

xDaisy

Divinity Intended

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am very well and settling into my new home in South East London. Yes, I have moved 🙂 I had no idea what a real home with the most appropriate energies around you could do for a person… It really is amazing how different I feel about everything and how much freer I feel on a human level.

I would like to share with you this piece of writing I did about 3 years ago, which I uncovered during the move. I wrote it on a retreat, held by my friends Chetana and Will. I hope that perhaps it carries you somewhere:-

Divinity Intended

I cannot speak…for talking this out is nothing at all anymore. This Silence bears witness to all of that and is also all of that. No need for words anymore. My silent spoken friend, awareness, finally stayed after his tea was drunk.

I saw what is true for me and accepted the somehow burden of it. This being done, You came in again. Then, the deeper revelation – the surrender……. No holding back this time. You showed me all, You revealed Yourself in the night, in the day, in the detail – all at once. That timeless moment – Now. All my burdens are laid down in You. All my heavy weighty blindness and my deafness to Your song is gone. Now I see it all. The game that I played – You knew my every move. You were always bathing it in that Light, yet only now can I see this.

What needs to happen, needs to happen. Yes, this is true. But what I failed to understand was the pitch perfect way this is all going. The sheerness of a thousand songs called out in Your name. It must be as it is and as it will be. You are the One, I am That. I found You again, and in the finding, I am no longer me. No longer isolated from You, my beautiful Muse, my all, my everything. I didn’t know that this way is the way. This precise way which you are unfolding… Divinity Intended. Not outside anymore, not happening to a me. Divinity Intended. A button unbuttoned and a comb combed. The jeans and the hair of Existence.

What has to happen…it’s unfolding, opening – at Its pace alone. Only Your rhythm exists. You lovemaker… It’s all happening now, and now, and now. There is no other; no other at all. This is Your game, and I feel no distance from You anymore. Somehow, I have not transferred this, not managed to translate this – the incredible depth of what is here.

Upcoming events you may be interested in:-

Monthly Satsangs are now held at the MA Centre UK (Amma’s ashram in Bromley) 🙂 Please email vakeesyam@fastmail.fm 

Marlies Cocheret is offering a websang meditation group (by donation) each Wednesday, at 6pm (UK time): https://www.marliescocheret.com/

Tony Parsons is having his next Open Discussion in Hampstead on the 1st June:-

http://www.theopensecret.com/talks.html#london

My wonderful housemates are offering a concert at Alternatives (in Piccadilly) on the 3rd June. Please contact me re: tickets. They are actually upstairs singing as I write this 🙂 🙂 🙂 Here they are in action:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m88nld_V5aA

Rupert Spira is next appearing in London on the 7th June in Marylebone:-

https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/meet

And finally, if you would like to go on retreat with Adyashanti in England this August, you can still get on the waiting list (which many people end up getting onto retreat from, in my experience) : https://www.adyashanti.org/programs/in-person/retreats-detail/england-5-night-retreat-1449

 

I would like to remind you that sessions are now 1 & 1/4 hrs and are priced as so:-

Call-out (in your home) = £100

Barbican venue = £90

Distance healing = £75

Please make a note of these changes if you have not already done so. Please also note that the quickest and easiest way to get hold of me is via a message of some kind, or a phonecall.

Love to you and bye for now,

xDaisy

Earthshift and Deepening in Divinity

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am well and finally getting the chance to sit down and write to you. At the end of my time with Amma in India, I actually went on an unplanned trip to Boston to do some advanced training in Vortex Healing, as some of you have heard.

The first class I took was the ‘Earthshift’. This type of Vortex class is a fantastic opportunity to work on the earth and on humanity’s consciousness as a whole. Ric (the founder of Vortex Healing and teacher of this class) had perceived a particular point of ‘choice’ in human history where the human race had moved into a type of Maliciousness / negativity / evil. He wanted our help as a group to release this karmic choice point (which had actually happened 200,000 years ago), thereby aligning humanity a little more closely with Love and Truth instead. The angelic realm was very involved in this. Amongst other extras, we also focussed our channelling power into humanity’s psyche and the individual karmic burdens which were part of this Maliciousness at the level of humanity as a whole.

The second class was one in which we melted into embodiment of another class I took a few years ago (you may remember, it was called ‘Awakening to Divinity’). This class was about resting in and as Divinity, utilising powerful group meditations and transmissions to assist this. There really isn’t much to say about that as you can imagine – lol! But what I can speak about are the new skills and insights I have to offer you in sessions, which also came from this training.

Ric discovered that the core emotional (karmic + genetic) position of human beings and also other species, is Loneliness. The Core Loneliness we feel deep down exacerbates the false sense of separation from Divinity, and in turn creates hunger for various things : power, status, security, sex, connection, love etc. etc. At the same time, the survival anxiety conditioning we carry fuels that hunger. So this core emotional position is very important to address and can have amazing results, which is why we even worked on Core Loneliness in the class itself.

Whereas before in session, the Divine was transmuting the point of choice (in terms of a particular issue) for you (i.e., the point in childhood where something happened, like a trauma, and you ‘chose’ to align with and continue a particular past-life theme), because of this class several other Choice Points can also now be released – including Genetic and BodyMind Choice Points.

Another amazing tool I have from this class is called Bio-Dynamic Flow. Receiving this work feels a bit like Cranial-Sacral or Jin Shin techniques. A variety of ‘flows’ and ‘tides’ that exist everywhere in creation are activated and directed to melt away places of rigidity and tension in the human body, and system as a whole. This Bio-Dynamic Flow moves in slow waves, akin to there being a ‘very long tide’ in Cranial work, if you like. Please note that this particular tool can only be used in person. The best description I have heard of it so far was from a client, who said, “It’s like relaxing at the level of atoms.”

I am changing the timing and fees of my work. Sessions are now 1 & 1/4 hrs:-

Call-out = £100

Barbican venue = £90

Distance healing = £75

Please make a note of these changes.

There are some upcoming events in London which you might be interested in:-

Mother Meera is giving her ‘staring Darshan’ near Preston Road (almost Wembley but not quite) on the 30th April and 1st May:-

https://mothermeera.org.uk/darshan-uk/

Br. Shubamrita (a senior disciple of Amma) is coming from the ashram in India to give a talk on ‘Overcoming Loneliness’ (no, the synchronicity has not been lost on me – lol!):-

Sat 4th May, 6pm – 9pm, Merton Arts Space, Wimbledon Library, Compton Road, London SW19 7QA

Rupert Spira is giving a talk at the Steiner venue in Marylebone on the 10th May:-

https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/meet

I hope you had a good Easter, and perhaps attended the wonderful Extinction Rebellion 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

Back in London :-)

Hello 🙂

How are you? I have missed you on my epic trip! I am back in London and giving sessions – so please contact me by text, WhatsApp or Messenger to book.

I think the biggest gift Amma gave me this time was to make me believe in love again. Or perhaps to remind me that I never really stopped believing. And she did this in one single Darshan (the hug). When you consider what I have been through recently, with the breakdown of my engagement to Steve, this is quite something. I had spent two months crying, yet as soon as Amma returned to the ashram from her North India Tour, I received a spontaneous unplanned Darshan (without even a token), and everything changed. It was as if the light-switch of my heart got turned on again. How she does what she does I will never know, but I am so deeply grateful that she does it. And thus my personal healing journey began…

I heard a story at the ashram, from a long-time Amma devotee, which I would like to share with you. It is taken from recorded talks by Swami Paramatmananda (Nealu). Many many years ago, when the ashram was a different place and Amma’s organisation was small, it was nearing bedtime and Amma was brushing her teeth with the Swamis. Suddenly she froze in the middle of brushing and fainted on the floor. When she had come round, Swami Paramatmananda asked, “Amma, what happened – why did you pass out?” Amma told him to go and look in a particular hut on the ashram. There he would find a monk sitting in front of his altar and crying to the Divine. Amma said that this monk’s focus was so one-pointed to the Divine, to realise enlightenment, that she had left her body to go directly to him. That was why she had collapsed. Sure enough, the Swami went to the hut and there was the monk in swathes of devotion, crying his heart out in surrender in front of his altar.

To finish (as I have very limited time for anything but giving sessions at the moment) I want to share an inspiring quote which I heard on the plane, as part of a TED talk on emotional maturity:-

“Courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is fear walking.”

Sending you so much Love and Peace,

xDaisy

India Sun Rising

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I received more replies to my last email than to any other email I have ever written. It is good to discover that authenticity and transparency are so valued in the world. Your responses were wise, insightful and heart-warming, and all that positive energy has done wonders for the healing process I am in. Having said that, this is the process of my lifetime, and I am still so deeply in it that it is too early to share about it just now. As I mentioned in the other email, I will be taking my time with Amma in Amritapuri to heal myself. But please know that I will be giving sessions again from the 10th April onwards.

Events you might like:-

On Saturday 23rd March, there are Bhajans and Satsang (including meditation and chanting) at Amma’s UK ashram in Bromley. Please arrive by 5 30pm: 40A Letchworth Drive, Bromley, BR2 9BE

On Saturday 31st March, there are Bhajans and Satsang (including meditation and chanting) at Amma’s UK ashram in Bromley. Please arrive by 10 30am: same address

On Friday 5th April, Rupert Spira will be giving a talk in Marylebone:-

https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/meet/2019/04/05/evening-meeting-at-rudolf-steiner-house-london

On Saturday the 6th April, Tony Parsons will be giving a talk in Hampstead:-

https://www.theopensecret.com/talks.html#london

I will be flying tomorrow. Take good care of yourselves while I am away, and please meditate 🙂 Amma always reminds us that meditation is more precious than gold, and that even a few moments spent in meditation are not a waste of time.

Much Love to you, I will miss you,

xDaisy

Fierce Grace

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I will get straight to the point today. I’m afraid I have some shocking and sad news which I want to share with you as a matter of transparency and authenticity. Within the last few weeks, Steve has ended our engagement and our relationship. I think we are both still in shock about this. The change is drastic, especially on a human life earth level. Knowing him as well as I do, I know that he would not have done this without good reasons, even though these reasons are only partially clear at the moment.

In facing and working through the extreme emotions and thoughts I am having, I am moving gradually into acceptance. Slowly, I am developing trust in what is happening. And when my intuition visits, it seems to be saying Yes to the ending of my partnership with Steve. I am left in astonishment at how unpredictable the dynamic aspect of Truth is.

As self-care, I have decided to take my upcoming time at the ashram in India with Amma (7th March – 8th April) to focus on healing myself. Before and after this period I am still working, so please don’t be shy about asking for sessions.

Love and best wishes to you,

xDaisy

Happy News :-)

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I would like to begin by sharing a portion of my diary with you, from the time I was recently at the ashram in India with Amma. Even though it is always hard to translate what being there is like, I hope you get a sense of it from this:-

5/12/18

[written retrospectively, after a few days] When Steve and I arrived on this ashram and entered our room, Silence fell deep in my heart. I sat in a chair by the window and watched a palm frond blowing in the wind, seeing the sea in the background. Everything was made of Silence. It was such a penetrating sensation……bodily, and on every other level as well. Then, as I sat down, I began to feel ripples of Silent Energy washing through my brain and body. Everything had come to a still point and the visceral sense of this went on for a few hours. The experience (for want of a better word) was marked by not looking for anything. I was not trying to get anything. Understand that I was not making any effort to be like that, it was just happening – quite without my say-so. Silent Being: this is a way of (perhaps) describing what it was. And I simply did what was natural: sitting down in a chair, gazing, lying down on a bed. After a while, a few insights drifted to me and opened up inside like flowers. ”

I have some very happy news: Steve and I are engaged 🙂 🙂 🙂 Amma talked to Steve about it during his darshan, and we decided soon after that 🙂 🙂 🙂 

I will be returning to the ashram for the month of March, and I will be offering distance sessions from there – so please do book. Alternatively, please arrange your in-person sessions around the India dates (which are 7th March – 8th April) and note that I am indeed currently in London.

If you are looking for things to do in London, here are the next dates for Tony Parsons and for Rupert Spira:-

Tony: Saturday 2nd Feb, 2pm – 5pm (plus social afterwards) at The Friends Meeting House in Hampstead, £15

Rupert: https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/meet/2019/04/05/evening-meeting-at-rudolf-steiner-house-london

Enjoy 🙂 and I hope to see you soon 🙂

xDaisy

Journey Into The Heart

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am well and enjoying the build-up to my trip to be with Amma in India tomorrow 🙂 I will have to make this newsletter very brief and a little speedy I’m afraid.

I will be away from tomorrow 27th Nov – 22nd Dec. Please note that I will have limited digital access while on the ashram, but you can try me on WhatsApp, Messenger and email.

I would love to hear any stories about your experiences of Amma’s recent visit to Surrey if you would like to share them. I had an absolutely wicked time! Just loved it! And through our seva (selfless service) in the massage area, our team made £7000 for Amma’s charity ‘Embracing The World’ 🙂 In case you didn’t know (since it is a unique attribute, as far as I know) Amma’s entire organisation is run without anyone being paid. No money which comes in goes to any person within the organisation. All work is carried out voluntarily and for free, with people donating their valuable attention, effort and time to make all the incredible things which Embracing The World achieves possible. This means that everything generated can go directly to assist people living in poverty, orphaned, hit by natural disasters, homeless, in need of life-saving surgery – the list goes on and on. Particularly impressive is Amma’s work to empower women in India by giving them grants to start their own businesses, after learning that poverty is best alleviated through women generating income.

www.embracingtheworld.org

Some exciting events coming up:-

Bromley ashram will be opening some time in the New Year. We are all working hard to make this possible 🙂 When it is up and running there will be satsangs, talks and all kinds of activities going on there. It feels very special for Amma to have a centre in the UK at last, after decades of trying to find a place 🙂

I advise booking now for Adyashanti in London for a very rare satsang on the 16th Aug next year. See ‘Alternatives’ or ‘EventBrite’ sites. Adya is also doing retreats in both Holland and Woldingham (Surrey) just before this, and you can enter the waiting list for these here: www.adyashanti.org

There is a Foundational training in Vortex Healing® in London in February – see www.vortexhealing.com

Ok, I better finish packing! See you after the 22nd Dec, and enjoy yourselves 🙂

Lots of Love,

xDaisy

Amma Hits London Tomorrow! :-)

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am good 🙂 I have spent the day (like my other days off at the moment) helping to build the new ashram for Amma in Bromley. I love doing seva (selfless service)… 🙂 It honestly makes me happier than anything in the world. I have no idea why – lol! But I really love it. Soon the new place will be ready and will operate as the M.A. Centre for the UK, and as a community centre in between Embracing The World events.

Tomorrow Amma comes in person to Sandown Racecourse in Esher, Surrey. The final night is Friday and it’s the all-nighter. Here is all the information you need:-

www.amma.org.uk

If you haven’t yet met Amma, here is a documentary you may be interested in watching:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YsxZI0PBl_A&t=17s

I am still here until the 27th, when I fly to the ashram in India for 3 and a half weeks – so I will return from there on the 22nd December. Please book your sessions accordingly, as I will not be able to give sessions from the ashram this time. I will be available via WhatsApp, Messenger and email there though, but bear in mind it is rural India without Wifi, so contact will be sporadic.

If you come to Amma in Sandown this week, come and find me in the massage area where I should be for most of the 3 days. Much Love to you all 🙂

xDaisy

Amma in London :-) :-) :-)

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I want to share the exciting news that Amma is coming on the 14th – 16th (incl all night 16th) November! She is returning to Sandown Racecourse (Surrey) this year. If you would like a gentle Seva (service job) with good vibes, please come and help us in the massage area. You can either help on reception, or (if you are a qualified and insured masseur) by giving treatments. Even a couple of hours volunteering makes a huge difference to Amma’s program, and to her unique international humanitarian aid charity ‘Embracing The World’. Doing Seva (selfless service) also creates happiness within and fills you with Shakti (Divine Energy) 🙂 Here is the link for information on the venue, transport and how to get a free Darshan (hug) token etc.:-

www.amma.org.uk

People often tell me about ‘seeing signs’, or ask me what I think about this. Spending time with Amma in Holland recently gave me the chance to be in solitude for long periods of time, and in that space some wisdom came to me which I want to share with you. What hit me is that, truly,  when we see a ‘sign’, we are often simply seeing our conditioning reflected – as if in a mirror. What we see, especially the ‘bad’ stuff, is usually not truth, but merely ego playing. It is mind, and that tends to see what it wants to see (no matter how convincing things seem). Many times we are taking things to be truths which are really our own negative (or positive) fantasies. The very origin point of such conclusions about ourselves, life and others is missing the mark completely. True truth, which can come as instinct or intuition, although it doesn’t need to, isn’t like that. It is calm and without doubt, it is clear without being forced, and without forcing. It is usually rarer than all those ‘signs’ and mind-made things.

Amma’s Devi Bhava speech in Holland was very moving and, though I tried to write down a lot of it, I was too moved to be writing during much of it. Absorbing her wisdom ended up being quite consuming. There were a few things I got down, though, which I would like to share with you. Amma said that there is a big difference between our physical and mental health: our physical health depends on how much we move our body, whereas our mental health depends on how still we keep our mind. She also pointed out that when we pour out our sorrows to God, it is actually like a meditation – a quest to reach God. And I love Amma’s version of make-up: she said, “Let us colour our lips with words of truth.”

I will be returning to Amritapuri (Amma’s ashram in India) from the 27th Nov – 22nd Dec, and during that time I will be unavailable for sessions. However, you can contact me on WhatsApp, Messenger and email, where I will be available for any crises. So please get your sessions in before that period, or book for afterwards.

Love,

xDaisy

Devotion

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am here in London, adjusting to the changes that my life brings, in this case the return from ashram life to city life. I don’t know if anyone remembers that seminal track by Goldie – ’Inner City Life’? That more-or-less encapsulates how it feels.

When sitting down to write about a living master, one faces a dilemma: the sense that the living presence of such a being, and the ‘experience’ (for want of a better word) of that, can never be confined to words or descriptions. It’s very hard to say anything about Amma. She both is and is not, she manifests as both form and formless in a continuous cascade. Perhaps the way in which my friends and I feel her in the most tangible way, is as Supreme Love: a Love that goes completely beyond anything imaginable, and which cuts through every vestige of the human ego, revealing the ultimate secret of this universe. If anyone is asking why I spend so much time with my spiritual teacher, this is why.

I wish I could give some kind of account of my stay with Amma in Amritapuri, but that really would just be words. You see, it’s a living thing with her. You don’t go about your day and then sit down and write your diary, and feel all good about what you’ve understood, and then go to sleep again. It’s not like that. The path with Amma is the path of action, of expression, of interaction and of an outpouring of a selflessness you had no idea was inside you, waiting to come out. This Love moves, this Silence transforms without leaving itself. This true way throws the human being into complete Mystery, not only once, but constantly. And miracles rain down upon everyone in that ashram like the monsoons. I’m aware that I sound like I’ve drunk the Kool-Aid – lol!

Those of you who have visited the ashram will know that one of the ways people deepen in their closeness with Amma and her teachings, is through sharing stories about her. I heard many extraordinary accounts while I was there this time. One never knows whether such stories are true, mythological or a version of a truth. To me, that is not ultimately the most important thing: for me, it is this unknown space…this Mystery, that such stories deepen me into which matters the most. One night, we met a new friend. As we got to know him over the course of our stay on the ashram (in saying ‘we’ and ‘our’, I am referring to Steve and I – yes, we are back together 🙂 🙂 :-)), this friend began to tell us the story of how he met Amma. The story begins before he was born. His father heard about Amma and took my friend’s sister to meet Her in Manchester in 1989. When they went for Darshan the father said to his daughter, “You are in the presence of God, you can ask anything you like.” The daughter told Amma that she wanted a little brother. Amma looked to the father and asked if he and his wife wanted another child. The father replied Yes, but that they could not, because his wife had gone through the menopause. Amma said Ok, and smiled at the daughter. A couple of months later, the mother began her periods again. Soon after this, she was pregnant. My friend was born in due course. Not long after the birth, Amma was due to visit England again. The father stayed at home with his new son (my friend), while the mother – who had never met Amma yet – and her daughter went to the program. As the mother fell into Amma’s arms for Darshan, Amma said to this woman – who she was meeting for the first time and had no information about – “Are you happy now that you have a son?” The mother burst into tears and surrendered. Hearing this story flooded me with energy rushes and goosebumps. I would never want to, or try to, prove whether it is true or not. I don’t know that. All I can say is that the sense of resonance throughout my entire being upon hearing it was overwhelming, and that the feeling of reality, realness, hitting-the-mark – whatever you want to call it – opened up within me in a profound way.

This actually leads me into something else I wanted to share with you. People often ask me about intuition, and feel that I have some expertise in this area. I don’t know about that, but I did discover something more about the whole thing when I was with Amma in the ashram. I hope that including this diary entry might assist you in your own journey with with your sense of intuition / instinct.

12/9/18

The answer came in Darshan today. There was no need to tune-in, check, ‘ask Amma inside’, or anything like that. When I was relaxed and open – simple, and in my being, one could say – I felt during Amma’s long embrace that [X]. It didn’t come mentally. It didn’t come through any kind of asking. It didn’t come in a big bang. It came through the feeling body. This relative truth came as a sort-of feeling, a kind-of sense, which ran like a river through my heart. So, yes, as [Y] reminded me that time: trust the truth that comes naturally, like a gift.”

That’s all for now. If you would like to book a session or talk about anything, please call, message or text me.

Much Love,

xDaisy

“The silent abyss beyond all knowing” ~ Adyashanti

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am in the midst of a potent time in my life, between the retreat I have just completed with Adyashanti and the time I am about to spend with Amma. I feel such wonderment and gratitude about this. They are the only words I can find in this moment to express how I am feeling. I don’t know why my life is this way – so filled with Divine opportunities – and why it is not another way. I can only bow down before the Grace that brought this all here.

The way I feel from being on the 7 day silent meditation retreat with Adyashanti is that I have now put all my eggs in one basket – that of Silence. There is this abiding trust now in the wisdom of Silence itself. On the level of experience (as it could be called), the Silence has become the foreground. It is hard to give an explanation of what this means for anyone who is struggling to understand (which may be no one of course). But here is an excerpt from my diary on retreat, of a particular day when this started to open fully:-

“Something really beautiful began to happen during the Silent Sittings today. I could, and still can, see all the way through my thoughts. I experience that absolutely everything arising there is conditioning. Previously, I had been assigning Truth to many many things…… Now I see that none of this is Truth. The contraction deep in my belly when something comes up is not Truth – it is conditioning. It’s the same with the things people say to me, and what arises in me in reactivity – conditioning. None of this is Truth. I am finally free.

I don’t say this as a grand statement about enlightenment. I mean simply that I am free from the grip of my mind and my deep emotional conditioning, inasmuch as I see it for what it is. It is no longer fooling me. I see through it all in a clear way. I am free.

In a sense it could be said that in the meditations, I perceived what arose in the Silence and the Silence itself as distinct from one another. And perhaps this is why Silence is often likened to the unknown. Because it is that – Silence is unknown and unknowing everything.”

I have decided to take my upcoming time in India off work for self-care and to volunteer for Amma’s charity ‘Embracing the World’, in their efforts to care for those affected by the flooding in Kerala.

This means I will be unavailable from the 30th August to the 26th September.

I will have limited digital contact, so you are welcome to try me. But please be aware that I cannot give sessions during that time.

Wishing you love and freedom from the heart of Silence,

xDaisy

Amma: Compassion Visionary

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am very well indeed 🙂 I was hoping to write to you earlier, but it seems now is the time. First of all, just to let you know that I am back in London and working – so please do message or call my phone to book a session. Plus, I have the venue back. So it’s Wednesdays at Barbican. Some of you will appreciate this, as you either cannot have sessions in your home, or prefer not to. House calls, though, and distant sessions remain available.

Being with Amma on her west coast US Tour was phenomenal… If you have not yet had the chance to meet this fascinating visionary of Compassion, please do take the opportunity. Amma tours for around eight months of each year and the rest of the time is in her ashram in Kerala (India). So, if you are ever going abroad, check in with her websites to see if your paths cross. The dates for the London program at the moment look to be the 11th – 12th November at Sandown Race Course in Surrey (with the Devi Bhava all-nighter being on the 12th). Please do check nearer the time for the update on this, as it can change.

Amma is not just another teacher, another guru. We are talking about, without mincing words, the most exact embodiment of Divinity on the planet alive today. The benefits of spending time in Her physical presence simply cannot be quantified. Just a few examples of this are: experiencing the true nature of Unconditional Love, broadening learning on how to give and why it is so important, and awakening and embodiment. Not to mention engaging in the far-reaching humanitarian aid work Amma is doing, through Her global charity ‘Embracing the World’, and all its volunteers. Bear in mind that neither Amma, nor the Swamis or Swamini, nor any of her senior devotees, nor any of us are paid for the work we do. This is why her charity remains uniquely effective in delivering to its millions of recipients in India and all over the world.

Check out her charity:-

www.embracingtheworld.org

Her US Tour (still happening):-

www.amma.org

And her Indian site:-

www.amritapuri.org

Above, you will find all the information you need on meeting Amma and on her charitable activities. If you do not, please don’t hesitate to ask me.

I want to give you a little personal account of just a couple of the amazing things I experienced with Amma this time. The first is a diary entry from my working week in between having just taken the Vortex Healing® Manifesting Intention course and my time with Amma:-

25/5/18

I was in my bedroom contemplating this continuous drive towards God which I feel so pressingly within. All of a sudden, an alarm began to ring very loudly. I had never heard this particular alarm before and didn’t know where it was coming from. I searched the room. Finally, hidden behind furniture, I found this old dusty digital clock; clearly, it had been left untouched for months, maybe even years. Within the displayed time was 108. As I gazed at this in amazement, the numbers turned to 109, and the alarm clock stopped ringing.

As many of you know, 108 is a particularly auspicious number in Indian spirituality and we chant the 108 Names of the Divine Mother as part of Amma’s recommended sadhana (spiritual practices). A week and a half afterwards, it felt like this bolt-from-the-blue came to fruition while I was on Tour with Amma. I was in Seattle and had been up all night on Devi Bhava, being with Amma and doing seva (selfless service) with my friends. Here is an excerpt from what I wrote:-

4/6/18

After Darshan, I was given a seat right in front of Amma. I fell Silent, totally peaceful, content and happy. Eventually I was moved, but I lingered at the back of the stage. I was left untouched standing there for more than an hour – during which time I was totally transfixed by Amma. Watching Her, I deepened more and more into Silence.

Then, the man who plays the guitar beautifully began to play a solo during Swami Dayamrita’s bhajan set. It was so wonderful, it began to carry me… Suddenly, I was overcome and I began to cry. I felt everything and nothing, I felt union. The sense of union (for want of a better word – a word that doesn’t exist) was so deep…in a felt way, in a way that was choiceless and without an exit gate or any room for doubt. I felt relief and completion in a way that was total. I called out in my heart to Amma, “Thank you, thank you, thank you Amma. I can hardly believe that this is my life. Help me to Surrender – I want to Surender all of my life, everything, to You.” I was crying for a long time; every time I would look at Amma, it would start again. It had hit me – really, really hit me – what She is doing here. I felt overwhelmed at seeing the Reality of Her. That she chose this life she is living – that She has come to us to uplift us, in the most profound sense – the whole world, the whole of humanity. It’s hard to get it across in words, what I felt and perceived. I kept crying and silently calling out to Amma in my heart, “Thank you, thank you Amma – thank you Amma, thank you Amma.” The gratitude I felt was completely overwhelming. In between my tears and praying, I would simply watch Her giving Darshan, feeling this one-pointed longing / bridging into Divinity itself – like I was being fast-tracked to God. When my mind would occasionally start up again, Amma would turn and look at me, and my mind was stopped, and I would be returned into the Silence. It was as if She was showing me the utter beyond-ness of Divinity through this whole thing.

I would like to end with a quote directly from Amma. I hope you enjoy it. I recommend reading it out loud to yourself for full effect:-

“Compassion does not see the faults of others. It does not see the weaknesses of people. It makes no distinction between good and bad people. Compassion cannot draw a line between two countries, two faiths or two religions. Compassion has no ego; thus there is no fear, lust or passion. Compassion simply forgives and forgets. Compassion is like a passage. Everything passes through it. Nothing can stay there. Compassion is love expressed in all its fullness.”

❤️ Amma (Sri Mata Amritanandamayi Devi)

Love,

xDaisy

AMMA :-) :-) :-)

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am happy and well, if tired, and now without the time to write you the email about the wonderful Manifesting Intention course which I had hoped to write. I leave to be with Amma early tomorrow morning. Many more of you wanted sessions than I had anticipated, so my time has been well spent giving these. Please bear with me on that email though; there is so much exciting stuff to share with you once I have the proper time to go through my notes.

I am thrilled about seeing my teacher! I will be with Her in Seattle, San Ramon and Los Angeles. I leave early tomorrow morning and return on the 19th June (morning). I will be engaged in seva (selfless service) while I am there and will have very limited digital access.

www.amma.org

I hope this email finds you well and enjoying life, and I very much look forward to seeing you after the 19th June.

Love,

xDaisy

Manifesting Intention

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am very well indeed, and writing to you from the airport lounge as I begin my epic journey of many parts back to London, from the Vortex Healing course in Virginia Beach which just ended.

I land late on the 24th, and am offering sessions from 25th to 31st May (before Amma for 2 weeks). Please WhatsApp, text or call to book for this period or for when I am back (19th June onwards).

The feeling of bliss and happiness is profound…really profound. If any of you are on the Vortex trajectory and thinking about stepping off, I strongly encourage you to persevere with courses. Awakening to Divinity (last one) and Manifesting Intention (this one) are hard to describe they are so good!! Just Wow……and very few words. I feel so grateful to the Divine, to Amma, to my Vortex family and to Ric, for facilitating this course. The sense of awakeness is ever deeper and deeper. That’s the most amazing thing. And this sense of happiness and bliss arising from within, regardless of situations, amazes me… Everything is so soft…

I could just hug and kiss everyone! Probably not advisable though, in an airport lounge.

I am so looking forward to sharing this new energy of Manifesting Intention with you 🙂 🙂 🙂  Must go for now, but simply wanted to connect with you all and share this…this – whatever this is, in some way. I will write some coherent stuff soon. There’s a lot of new and interesting information with this course.

Much Love,

xDaisy

Love

Hello 🙂

How are you? 

I want to write a little about my experiences with Mother Meera during her visit to London, happening now. I have been fortunate enough to have been seeing her for around 10 years. Please see this website if you would like to know more:-

https://mothermeera.org.uk/

As soon as I was seated in the hall yesterday, there was this return to the natural state. It’s not that easy to put into words, but suddenly meditation was happening with no meditator and without any effort to meditate. I could feel Silence pouring like liquid gold through my body, and now and then there were rushes of something like energy, as if my cells were coming alive after a deep sleep. This took over, and in that takeover, I returned to innocence. Each thought, story and emotion which arose was unresisted and simply seen for what it was, without indulgence. Again, there was no efforting – it all seemed to happen without me. I sat like this for a long time. 

When it was my turn to join the queue for the staring Darshan, a bhajan from Amma began to ‘play’ in the background of my awareness 🙂 When I was in front of Mother Meera with her hands on my head, my mind came to a complete stop, and even this bhajan stopped. As she looked into my eyes, I experienced total and utter oneness…which seemed to pour itself into infinity. Everything left me – all suffering, all concepts – all things left. As I rose and walked down the steps after this, a different bhajan from Amma began to ‘play’ lightly once again 🙂 I sat for a long time afterwards. When Mother Meera did her group staring Darshan at the end, I noticed such a shift in the energy in the entire room… Did anyone else feel that? It was wonderful to see some of you there 🙂 and hopefully you all got my email detailing this visit a while back?. 

After I left with friends to eat together, several remarkable things happened that day, which I simply cannot see as anything but Divine synchronicity and Grace 🙂 Firstly, on the way home strangers kept talking to me – and this is on the tube in London!! One mother began to talk to me about her son skateboarding – a big part of my history in this life 🙂 On the next leg of my journey, a woman began to offer everyone her chocolate biscuits – literally opening them up to strangers in the carriage. I felt such a love for people radiating from this action and from within this woman…so much so that I commented on it, and she knew that she had this gift. It actually turned out that she used to serve me fish’n’chips in the area where I lived many years ago! This got me thinking of one of my closest friends in the world (whom I had become estranged from) who lived in that area too. Later that evening – and I’m not joking! – that friend called me, completely out of the blue, to apologise and ask if we could be friends again. Incredible… And then that night, my Mum and I started laughing together spontaneously like children – like we used to when we were both younger. We couldn’t stop! And then we hugged and made up about a stupid fight we’d had. I could hardly take in all the Grace… 

It really couldn’t have come at a better time. These last two months have been so painful… First my uncle died suddenly, then I broke up with my fiancé and then there grew this rift (described above) between my close friend and I. The pain of breaking with Steve got so intense that I was crying almost continuously, with bone-crushing emotional agony. In facing this depth of pain and loss without running away from it, I eventually experienced self-effulgence for perhaps the first time on my own. In the end, I was forced into the Light within myself. My heart still overflows with love and passion for Steve… And yet, simultaneously, there is a deep intuitive clarity that we cannot be together at this time. It’s the weirdest thing ever in my life. If I were to go against this, I would be sacrificing my integrity, and I simply cannot do that anymore. Even for the love of my life. 

I would love to hear your experiences with or after Mother Meera, so please don’t hesitate to write to me about them. Or about anything else (as I have demonstrated here! I hope you will forgive my indulgence :-). I look forward to seeing you or working with you again soon.

So much Love 🙂 🙂 🙂 

xDaisy

Joy

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am very well indeed. I feel the happiest I have ever felt in my life. Happiness comes and goes, so I’m not forcing meaning into this, but I must say it is a delight to feel this way 🙂 🙂 🙂

I apologise for not writing sooner. I have been doing a lot of Europe Tour with Amma. I have also been welcoming a new relationship into my life. Some of you have already met Steve 🙂 The deep significance of this relationship to me is hard to put into words accurately. Being single for 4 years beforehand, and fully exploring that, was really important for me. The few lovers I had during that time were meaningful and the wondrous solitude was needed and nourishing. Now to be in this awakening embodiment evolution with someone who wants the same thing, to be in love and to have so much in common on a human level, plus things which compliment in their differences, is a Grace I find hard to fathom.

So, Amma….! How was it for you? It was a huge and exciting joy to see many of you in Surrey and also in the other places I went to with Amma (Switzerland, the Netherlands and Valencia.) Thank you for visiting me in the massage area, those of you who could. I really don’t have words right now for the Amma experience from my point of view….. I think that may partly be because I just did the 108 Names, the 1000 Names and the IAM. No mind 🙂 All I can think of to say about how I feel for Amma is deeply in love, and deeply deeply grateful for what she has given me on this Tour.

The other good news is that I will now be living in London for the foreseeable future, so I will be available for sessions every day. Please text / WhatsApp / call to arrange (NB: I often have the Barbican venue available on Wednesdays).

Love, care and Silence,

xDaisy

Grace

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am very well. This past week, as I was walking across Victoria station and thanking the universe for orchestrating my journey from East Sussex perfectly, I uttered audibly, “It’s Grace.” Then it hit me – but everything is. Even after awakening there can be this tendency to think of Grace as coming from ‘outside’. As the realisation dawned on me, I saw that it’s not like that at all. There is no outside. Everything is Grace. The intensification of oneness that followed stopped me in my tracks (sorry London commuters!). The truth is, Grace isn’t ‘given to us’ when we’re good, because Grace is the very substance of everything. It’s what we are and what everything is, pre-existing whether we think we are good or bad in any moment.

I will be in London giving sessions Thursday (tomorrow) – Saturday, for the last time before America. Please call or text to book. Otherwise please feel free to book a distance session at any other time. As a reminder, I will be away in America for further training in Vortex Healing from the 11th – 23rd October (that’s next week). NB I will have very limited digital access at that time.

If, like me, you want to see Amma in Europe at a few places and haven’t booked or arranged things yet, do so soon because places are getting booked up and prices are rising. I am only just getting onto it now.

The Adyashanti retreat in Surrey next August is now open for registration. It’s 7 nights – a special treat nowadays 🙂 I highly recommend this silent meditation retreat, which I feel is second only to being with Amma in person. Here is the link (do it now if you want to, because they always get overbooked):-

https://www.adyashanti.org/index.php?file=retreatsdetails1&eventid=1366

I leave you with this from Marlies Myoku Cocheret, whose recent email moved me deeply:-

Please take a moment to realize that everything can drop at any moment. This body, this mind, this or that feeling or sensation – not in your time, but Her time. Where do you want to put your attention when the moment comes…..which is every moment?!”

~ Marlies Myoku Cocheret

Love,

xDaisy

As Deep As Peace

Hello 🙂

You are as deep as peace. Yes, you. I feel I want to share this truth, following the online meditation group I just did with Marlies Myoku Cocheret. If you would like to participate in this opportunity for Silence, check the calendar section of her website. The groups are by donation each Wednesday, at 6pm UK time.

http://www.marliescocheret.com

Something else I learned this week from this wonderful offering is that there is no difference in the Beingness here with eyes open or eyes closed. This may sound obvious, and I ‘knew’ it before, but I actually experienced and perceived it today. That is the difference between truth and fiction. It’s an incredible thing that this Being that we all are, this one thing, is here all the time and never goes anywhere. We run to many places searching for safety, but that is only a relative safety, meanwhile true safety does exist in one place. The discovery of this true safety is the end of fear, so much so that fear can still arise – is allowed to be what it is – within this deep vastness of the One, which could also be called Beingness or truth. And no one has to do anything to get to this recognition. I personally really enjoy meditation and all kinds of spiritual practices, yet no one factually needs to do that to see what they are, right now, in this moment. All that is required is seeing reality as it is, without allowing the Self to be fettered by objects ‘outside’ or ‘inside’ (objects meaning everything you can think of).

I would also like to share how much I am enjoying Rupert Spira, whom I went to see at Alternatives on Monday. Apologies for not telling you sooner, I didn’t remember that I was going until the day. Here is his website for more details (for example, an upcoming retreat on the 3rd December):-

http://www.non-duality.rupertspira.com

This coming week, I will be in London Monday – Wednesday inclusive (i.e., 25th – 27th September). Please call or text to book. At other times distance sessions are available.

A reminder of Amma’s visit on the 17th – 18th November (Devi Bhava – 18th night). Please note that AMMA IS NOT IN LONDON this year. She is in Esher, Surrey, at Sandown Race Course. You will do well to book accommodation, as the venue is not very easily accessible from London. See the following site for details:-

http://www.amma.org.uk

Enjoy your week,

Love,

xDaisy

Sessions in London: Saturday – Tuesday

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am well, and enjoying country life here in East Sussex. Children are playing in the background, out in the sun, and I feel such peace in my heart. I really don’t have much to report or offer in words today, but wanted to let you know that I will be in London Saturday – Tuesday. The sessions I have left are on Monday and Tuesday, at a home in Camberwell where I am house-sitting. Distance sessions are available at any other time.

Please note that I will be continuing training in Vortex Healing® in America from the 11th – 23rd October, at which time I will not be offering sessions and will have limited digital access of any kind.

I leave you with this, which a friend just sent me from Adyashanti:-

You do not need to be perfect to be whole, you do not need to be worthy to be complete…

You are not here to be perfect. No one is perfect. You are here to love, and to love well.  ~ Adyashanti

Love,

xDaisy

Outside of Mind

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I would like to share a poem I wrote this morning after sadhana, and inspired ever more by this deep practice (of the 1000 Names and the IAM technique from Amma).

What a violent thing

To bring mind in here!

To this sacred place,

This holy Silence.

 

Outside of mind

Lies all things,

And all non-things.

Your cascading lights

Cannot fool me anymore,

For I have found something

Here, exquisite.

 

In these long halls

Of Silence upon Silence,

I meet the innermost –

The maker –

The original Spark.

 

Yet She is so Silent…

So nothing,

And so everything.

 

No song-and-dance fanfare.

Simply Silence gazing,

Just gazing.

She sees it all –

Sips it all in,

And rests.

 

It is some miracle that this poem came out from me, considering that I am still in that heartbreak which I wrote to you about in February. Really it has been going on since January. The blood and the guts of this particular heartbreak are hellish. But I am ever grateful to my friends for their support, and similarly to Amma, Adyashanti, Vortex Healing and my healers. What to do? We are all in the same boat going down the stream, playing out our karma. Yet, paradoxically, this is happening right in the middle of an all-encompassing awakening embodiment evolution.

My friend Alexandra Stone was kind enough to interview me for her website, please have a look:-

http://www.alexandrastone.studio/blog/

And finally, I want to thank those of you who have been giving me such rich and powerful feedback on the sessions. When you are self-employed, the only way you really know you are doing a good job is when clients or teachers tell you so. My heartfelt thanks for bringing smiles and tears of joy to me 🙂

I have a couple of spaces left in London Sat & Sun. Also, let me know if Wed – Fri might suit you (as that is possibly when I will next be in London). In the meantime, please contact me for distance healing.

Much Love and gratitude,

xDaisy

Sessions in London: Fri (tomorrow) – Mon

Hello 🙂

I am now living in Ditchling temporarily, in a beautiful healing home full of yoga, Vortex and of course Amma, with friends 🙂 It’s stunning here… I can’t get over how lucky I am to have space, time and fire for embodiment, sadhana, self-healing and all the other things I love in life.

This is a short reminder that I will be in London this Fri – Mon inclusive. The spaces I have left are on Sunday and Monday, so please message me on WhatsApp or FB to book (or call me there / Skype.) Phone reception is terrible here, so internet is best for now. Or feel free to book a distant session on any other day.

Amma’s visit to London has been arranged now, thanks to the hard work of volunteers. She will be with us Friday 17th and Saturday 18th November (that’s the Devi Bhava) at Sandown Park Race Course. I will update you with details as they come in (they are not yet on the site).

I hope to see you in Londinium 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

London Sessions: Fri – Mon inclusive

Hello 🙂

How are you? I am well; missing you all actually, and hoping that you are getting on well. I will be in London offering sessions from Fri – Mon inclusive, so please call or text if you would like one. Internet, and even my T Mobile network (essentially all virtual communication methods) are still poor here in Rodmell village. BT are slowly fixing the problem. Hence why I cannot write as much to you as I would like, nor answer you as promptly as I would prefer. However, when it comes to distance sessions, everything works. Make of that what you will 🙂

I want to share the most beautiful passage from Adyashanti. We read it out loud in our Adyashanti group and it drew tears. I really haven’t ever met another person who can communicate through words what it is truly like to wake up and embody that awakening, in such an open, accurate and rich way. I suggest reading this very slowly:-

       “This inner revolution is the awakening of an intelligence not born of the mind but of an inner silence of mind, which alone has the ability to uproot all of the old structures of one’s consciousness. Unless these structures are uprooted, there will be no creative thought, action, or response. Unless there is an inner revolution, nothing new and fresh can flower. Only the old, the repetitious, the conditioned, will flower in the absence of this revolution. But our potential lies beyond the known, beyond the structures of the past, beyond anything that humanity has established. Our potential is something that can flower only when we are no longer caught within the influence and limitations of the known. Beyond the realm of the mind, beyond the limitations of humanity’s conditioned consciousness, lies that which can be called the sacred. And it is from the sacred that a new and fluid consciousness is born that wipes away the old and brings to life the flowering of a living and undivided expression of being. Such an expression is neither personal nor impersonal, neither spiritual nor worldly, but rather the flow and flowering of existence beyond all notions of self.

         So let us understand that Reality transcends all of our notions about Reality. Reality is neither Christian, Hindu, Jewish, Advaita Vedanta, nor Buddhist. It is neither dualistic nor non-dualistic, neither spiritual nor nonspiritual. We should come to know that there is more Reality and sacredness in a blade of grass than in all of our thoughts and ideas about Reality. When we perceive from an undivided consciousness, we will find the sacred in every expression of life. We will find it in our teacup, in the fall breeze, in the brushing of our teeth, in each and every moment of living and dying. Therefore we must leave the entire collection of conditioned thought behind and let ourselves be led by the inner thread of silence and intuitive awareness, beyond where all paths end, to that place of sacredness where we go innocently or not at all, not once but continually.

         One must be willing to stand alone – in the unknown, with no reference to the known or the past or any of one’s conditioning. One must stand where no one has stood before in complete nakedness, innocence, and humility. One must stand in that dark light, in that groundless embrace, unwavering and true to the Reality beyond all self, not just for a moment but forever without end; for then that which is sacred, undivided, and whole is born within consciousness and begins to express itself. That expression is the salvation of the whole. It is the activity of an inward revolution brought down into time and space.”

~ Adyashanti, The Way of Liberation, pg 37

I will leave you to digest that. I would love your comments, if you have some.

Much Love,

xDaisy

Walking in the Footprints of the Divine

Hello 🙂

How are you?

I am well, and thoroughly enjoying life in Rodmell. I was reflecting the other day that life here, each step, is like walking in the footprints of the Divine. When I do sadhana, when I walk on the South Downs, when I see my friends…there’s this sense of the One in a very potent way. It actually feels a bit like being high all the time, no matter what is going on inside or outside. I think it must be the way that nature reflects ones own Divinity continuously, right into the bones of the body. Feeling happy, content and easy becomes normal. In a more specific example: whereas normally I see with my eyes closed (as with sessions), when I do the 1000 Names or the IAM in my bedroom, I see with my eyes open: there are bright white lines of energy everywhere – the natural energy of creation.

I had an insight during a session this week, which may help to illuminate how and why Vortex Healing works – a question many of you have asked me. As I was channelling into someone, all of a sudden I perceived that the energy was literally saturated with timeless presence…to the point that it even was that presence, and as I tracked it I could see that this was infusing the conditioned pattern within this person. Then it was that very ’embrace’ itself which dissolved the conditioning. At the time, there were no thoughts or reflections, only a sense of total oneness. But afterwards I began to reflect that (presumably) the reason for this kind of saturation process is that the energies we use in Vortex arise directly from Divinity; I don’t see how anything else could have that depth of effect on patterning. Another way to look at it is that presence takes conditioning out of time. The only way the conditioning seems real is because it is time-based – it is history, it is not presently occurring. So when that aspect of time is released by the presence-suffused energy, then the conditioning has no option but to collapse back into the timeless – into eternity – i.e., absolute presence.

I would also like to share my experience with Mother Meera on Tuesday morning. Did any of you get to see her? I know some of you have written to me about it. Others of you, please do write with your experiences as I’m always interested to read them. Every time I see this being it is very different to the last. What I experienced this time was more in the touch than in the eye gazing itself – i.e., the part where you kneel in front of Mother Meera and she touches your head. When this happened, what I felt was everything within and in my external life align into a single point. Suddenly everything was fulfilled and made sense, but without the mind being involved at all. I suppose that’s one reason why I still go to her: to re-perceive what is taking place through my bodymind as Divinity all the time, yet often going unnoticed. It is without destination or reason, yet it is the only thing that’s truly real.

I am planning to write to you about my sacred time with Amma, but it is still percolating. I would like to highlight one thing, though, which she kept on repeating: her request is that we all plant trees, and especially encourage children to do so. This is in order to preserve nature.

Next week I will be in London giving sessions on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Please message or call me (preferably) if you would like one. Distance sessions are available sooner than that of course.

See you soon I hope,

Love,

xDaisy

Contemplation in the Sun

Hello 🙂

How are you?

First of all, I want to let you know that I will be in London on Wednesday this week in the Barbican. I need the rest of the week to sort out my housing situation in Brighton, which needs turning around within literally 7 days. Skype sessions are available though, of course.

I had one of those moments today, where I was between work (equine assisted therapy and a little job I do for a friend in London) and I stepped out into the sun in the garden where I was. I was immediately struck by the ordinary beauty of things. Simply the other buildings, the music from a party somewhere in the background, and the sky. Finally I could stop for a while, and I did. My mind began to chatter and then to fade, melting into my heart as often it does. It felt so good to feel, to be barefoot on the ground and to be able to loaf for an hour, with nothing to do! I felt so free… Silence pervaded completely. Eventually a thought came: What if I spent the rest of my life just being free? Something opened wider within, in this contemplation. I mean, what if any of us simply chose inner freedom, true peace, right now – and for every ‘now’ forever? I am well aware that this makes no sense in a way! But can you feel into what I’m saying? In other words, what if you, reading this right now, never ever left whatever realisation you have had about the true nature of what you are?

The next thought that came was, What would that take? I saw that it would require a willingness to relinquish all future plans. I also saw I would need to never leave what I know and to never believe or follow through on another thought / piece of negativity. It was humbling…to say the least.

Anyway, I wanted to share this exploration with you now, in hindsight, to see if you resonate with it or have perhaps had a similar kind of insight too? 🙂 Please do write with your comments on this.

Love,

xDaisy

London this week: today, Friday and Saturday

Hello,

How are you? A short note to say that for London sessions, today and Sat are now full this week. But there are a couple of spaces left on Friday. Distance sessions are always available of course, via Skype.

I also wanted to share this video with you. I never tire of Amma’s Swami Dayamrita. In particular it is his integrity, authenticity and humility which really touch me. They are rare qualities in people I have found. Let me know your feelings on this interview. Mine are very passionate!

SOULJOURNS – SWAMI DAYAMRITA, AMMA’S SENIOR DISCIPLE

SOULJOURNS – SWAMI DAYAMRITA, AMMA’S SENIOR DISCIPLE

Welcome to Souljourns and to the amazing story of a former atheist, a well educated man who came to know of Amma…

Much Love,

xDaisy

Easter Deal: Half Price on Friday & Monday :-)

Hello 🙂

I’m sorry about the short notice of this offer. I only just realised today that it is Easter this weekend. Therefore Good Friday and Easter Monday sessions are half price, £45, and will be done on Skype / phone only. This also applies to pre-booked sessions on those days.

I have a couple of spaces left this Thursday in London, so please let me know if you would like one.

Anyway, how are you?

I must say that I’m enjoying Brighton massively. The things I love the most are the sea, the beach, the South Downs and the people. They seem interested in celebrating life. There is perhaps more emphasis on sangha, friends, family, creativity, seva and sadhana. Then work is done to support lifestyle, rather than the other way round. I wish you were all here! In this sunshine, it is truly idyllic 🙂

Much Love,

xDaisy

Vibrational Reality

Hello,

The vibrational quality of reality has come into my life strongly this past week. I am talking about the sense that what we are – expressed as both formless and form – ripples outwards and touches everything. Paradoxically, this ‘vibrational reality’ is both everything and also emerges from everything – like a birth – simultaneously. And it’s not just when we are praying, meditating or having nice thoughts 😉 When we truly get this, deeply feel it, it is kind of shocking. Here it all is, broadcasting out, all the time. I would like to know, what is your sense of this?

I was at the bus stop in Camden late on Friday night, returning home from visiting my 4 year old friend and her mother and another friend. You can imagine the scene: chaotic, teaming with life, gritty, intense. I was engaged in the Adyashanti Fierce Love course I am currently doing, which involved a guided meta meditation (on my iPod). I found this meditation very difficult: to breathe in the sorrow of the world and breathe out loving kindness. Was it too exposing to do it right there, in the middle of a kind of bizarre babylon, I wondered to myself? I decided to do it anyway. Immediately, a man approached me asking for a cigarette. I replied that I was meditating. But I saw my spiritualised ego instantly: there I was, doing meta, and I basically told someone to fuck off in a very ‘nice’ way. Off went the man, and I felt sad. I let it go and continued the meditation. Within moments he was back. Suddenly, he started stroking my arm and holding it. Ordinarily I would have physically pushed him off, but something deeper stopped me. He asked, “Can you help me?” and I said “Yes” without hesitation or thought. Looking directly into his eyes now and taking out my earphones, I began to help him find a street he was looking for. Then he said, “Can I take you with me?”. There was so much longing in his eyes and deeper underneath that, his essence was shining out. “We can cuddle and watch Disney movies”, he continued. I refused and he said, “Can I kiss you?”. Again I refused and pointed him to the street he was trying to reach. He asked to kiss me again and again I said No. It may sound naive to some, but I knew what he really wanted to kiss. I knew what he really wanted to take with him. That’s an example of the movement of vibrational reality, which is a non-personal yet intimate movement. That’s the gift we are really able to give anyone, in any moment of our lives.

The way I felt during this event reminded me of a picture given to me by a client this week. He was using it to illustrate the way he felt during the recent Foundational Vortex Healing training, in which his Amma mantra was running automatically throughout.

~ Alex Grey, ‘Spiritual Energy System’ (1981)

A little reminder that I will be moving to Brighton on the 2nd April and commuting to London to give sessions each week. More on that as it unfolds. To conclude today, I thought I would share this beautiful poem which a friend sent to me having heard Adyashanti read it on the recent silent meditation retreat at Mount Madonna (California):-

There’s a thread you follow.

It goes among things that change,

But it doesn’t change.

People wonder about what you are pursuing,

You have to explain about the thread,

But it is hard for others to see.

While you hold it, you can’t get lost.

Tragedies happen, people get hurt or die,

And you suffer and get old.

Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.

You don’t ever let go of the thread.

~ William Stafford

Wishing you all well,

Love,

xDaisy

The Invitation Of Suffering

Hello,

Happy Shivaratri! Today Shiva’s energy pours into creation, like the sword of Truth cutting through vines of illusion, the perfect day to let go of all remaining attachments the ‘me’ is clinging to. With the addition of the full lunar eclipse coming on Sunday, you may be feeling like doing nothing rather than planning / manifesting. If so, I would really encourage you to trust this instinct, drawing awareness inside into the heart of Life. This is a fantastic time to engage in that inner dive, via sadhana, chanting, bhajans, relaxation, quietness, or whatever you feel truly drawn to.

Before I engage in the subject of my email today, I would like to announce two pieces of good news. Firstly, my close friend who I described in earlier emails is now cancer-free! Upon discovering this information from doctors, she said, “This is a miracle”. Considering that her father died suddenly in the middle of her cancer treatment, and that initially the cancer was seen as potentially fatal, I am inclined to agree with this statement. The other news is that my friend Daniel has been made into a Vortex Healing teacher. I can’t think of anybody I would rather be in this position 🙂

Now, aside from these wonderful things, I have been in the midst of deep personal suffering since the beginning of the year, the likes of which I have rarely experienced in this lifetime. The process is a mixture of internal and external, becoming so excruciating that I was basically left with three directions in which to go with it: 1) into the victim, 2) into improving my life in an attempt to fight back against things or 3) into Truth and a total embrace of what is. Once the first two were seen through, I was left with no choice but to take the third option. The way this all looked in real terms by the way, was a bloody mess. Yet I came to realise gradually that the suffering, which I had always managed to bypass in some way in the past without seeing that that was what I was doing, wasn’t going anywhere – if anything it was getting worse. That was the moment at which I was finally, genuinely, willing to lose to Life. It was at once a recognition of which of ‘us’ (though ironically there was no experience of separation) was stronger – that Life itself was simply much more immense than any remaining sense of me, and also a feeling of being crushed into oblivion by my own conditioning, or by God – honestly, I don’t even know which it was – but whatever it was, it worked. What I mean by ‘it worked’ is that suffering itself became the invitation into freedom, Truth, God, Love. I took it, and I continuously now accept that invitation on a moment to moment to moment basis. The felt sense is like a huge weight has been lifted off my body and there is a simple and profound texture of oneness pervading everything in experience. I have had many ‘drops’ into this before, but this time there is a sense of permanence (if I can use that word), of a not-coming-and-going, but a resting of oneness in / as this form.

So to save you time and struggle, I suggest this as a practice for you too. Begin to notice the nature of your suffering now: is it really something which shouldn’t be there? Can you receive it fully right now?

Listen to your gut instinct. From there you will sense your true Yes and your true No, both to these questions and more importantly to the situations, people and choices in your life.

Love,

xDaisy

Ammathon!

Hello 🙂

How was your Ammathon in London? I hope you got to see her. I had a wonderful time. Some highlights included getting Darshan with Mum in which Amma recognised her from 14 years ago, doing Arati for Amma (the flame) and feeling so deeply the sense of family and community. Also, I love to serve, especially Embracing the World, so that’s always good 🙂 I got a deep sense when doing the Arati to Amma that “I’m ok”, as if that was being said by Amma / Divine / my true Self. Sounds small, but it was actually very big for me. There was so much else, but I can’t write it all now. I will keep it brief as I am very tired and have yet to pack because……..

I have decided to go to the Netherlands with Amma at the last minute! I will be back on Thursday. Sorry that I couldn’t give you more notice about this.

I leave you with my two favourite quotes from Amma:-

(on meditation) “The mind automatically becomes still in the presence of Love”

and

(on being scolded for wildly serving) “In compassion, there are no rules”

Much Love and fond wishes to you,

xDaisy

ToDay of Manifestation

Hello 🙂

I have heard on the grapevine that today is an excellent day for manifesting….. 🙂 It would be a good idea for you to do something to bridge into your life what you need, want or what is your deepest desire in this lifetime.

Perhaps you could simply sit, allow Silence to prevail, and then call out from your heart to Divinity for what you want, as a deep prayer. Everyone will have their own version of what this looks and feels like. I felt called to do my own version this morning and it felt wonderful 🙂 Very blissful, which actually surprised me 🙂

Here is a little inspiration on your way:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf6TQoQmiPk

Love,

xDaisy

Homecoming

Hello 🙂

How are you? I hope you are engaging in your deepest intention, and that you are well. This weather in London, though greyer today, is a continuous joy to be in…

I want to write a little more about the effects of the silent meditation retreat with Adyashanti. As he says, a spiritual experience is only valuable inasmuch as it has a lasting effect on one’s everyday life. We’ll see about that in time… For now I can say that, since the retreat, something has changed. The Silence is here, in a new way. What also feels different is that my ‘questing’ energy, my chasing after Divinity, has come to an end. That energy was in me for nearly 20 years this year. I think I believed it was necessary to have that in order to find the Divine, but I now question whether that is true. It could be that my ‘questing’ actually masked Divinity from me. Either way, in the end I got far more, and also far less really, than I bargained for. Needless to say, my relationship with Amma, Vortex Healing and Adyashanti have transformed a great deal. That is ongoing and I can’t say much about it at the moment that would make sense. The funny thing is though, even my Mum has remarked on the change in me several times since this retreat. One time she said, “You know who you are now”. That raised a smile 🙂

What I can talk about is how my work with you has changed. My sessions now feel like I am resting and creating from Silence. Then I look to my sensing abilities and begin to see how the healing energy is naturally moving. It’s like painting with Light. One of you commented that, “You are like a conduit now. You don’t even need to channel.”

Adyashanti will not come back to Europe next year due to his health problems, but I highly recommend his retreats in America if you feel drawn:-

http://www.adyashanti.org/index.php?file=retreatsschedule

I would like to close with an excerpt from my diary on the retreat, which now feels almost predictive of the aforementioned stopping:-

“I found a snake by the side of the road today. It was dead. I told it I was sorry it had died, especially since it was so young – a baby, I think. It was charcoal grey on the underbelly and brown and radiant on top. It shone somehow, with brown, like one of those sandstone rings you can get. I wonder what kind of snake it is? I don’t remember seeing a snake in England before. The first three I saw were rattlesnakes, in Arizona, when I was eleven. The only other one I’ve seen was on the Ashram. That one was so beautiful: it was moving in that classic snake dance and it was bright green. Sort-of cascading along a sandy path. Come to think of it, they were all deeply significant times when I saw those snakes… I wonder what is happening here and what wonders are in store after this retreat? 🙂 This snake was so small and thin and beautiful. And it had a tiny, soft face. I saw the beauty in death.”

I look forward to seeing you soon,

Love,

xDaisy

Oceans

Hello,

I wanted to remind you that I am back in action now and that I will be offering distance sessions via Skype or phone on Monday Bank Holiday, half price: £45. This deal includes pre-booked sessions.

The retreat was sensational… Really something unexpectedly mind-blowing. What I want to say about Adyashanti is that he is possibly the only teacher or guide I know who refuses to take authority away from anyone, even in a subtle way. I have found this to be consistently true over the 14 years that I have known him. The effect of that, is actually immense. Greater than I could have imagined before doing this silent meditation retreat. I will write more as I go. For now, I would like to share with you a poem I wrote in the middle of the retreat (hence the title of this post). However, due to formatting issues here, I am unable to do so. Therefore please contact me on daisynokes22@yahoo.com to receive it.

See you soon,

Love,

Daisy

Silent Meditation Retreat with Adyashanti

Hello,

I must say I am thrilled to have the opportunity to deepen into this great, deep silence……….who knows what will happen in this great adventure into the unknown? The inner dive, swan dive, into mystery. I will be unavailable in communication – on a silent meditation retreat – from tomorrow until the 22nd Aug, when I will be back in action.

I want to share a few more learnings from the Ammathon (as a friend rightly called it!), which I hope will benefit you. During the program in Toronto, Amma said something which really struck me. She said, “Vasanas have no power of their own. It is we who give them power.” I realised in that moment, how powerless negativity really is. Her statement also cut through, in me, the tendency to become so familiar with something, that I begin to misuse it. What I mean is that I have talked about my ‘vasanas’ (latent negative tendencies) or issues or behaviour so many times, I can forget that it is I myself who permits them to have the power they have and who actually gives that power to them. I thought this could strike a chord for many of you as well. I would add that it is our tendency to identify with such internal arisings, which is the mechanism by which we give them the most power.

The most core life story I had, the one which had most coloured my experience of reality in this lifetime, came up during the last couple of days with Amma. We save the best for last, don’t we? For me, that was the love story – the agony and the ecstasy of romantic love, and underlying that, the nagging feeling that the right relationship would fulfil me and close any remaining ‘gap’. This probably sounds familiar to some of you, perhaps to many of you. I know – it’s a hard one to admit! I am not going to share the private details of that, sorry 😉 But please bear with me anyway. There is something more important than that part of the story. It began on the treadmill, of all places, not somewhere I frequently find myself. But going to the gym occasionally, during the tour, helped me get time by myself (which is almost completely impossible on staff) and helped me move energetics that were stuck. Suddenly on this treadmill, the desire to be free of that core story hit me, like never before. I simply HAD to be free of it; I could carry it all no more. So with this fire, I made a silent cry – a prayer – within, to Amma. With that, I let go, knowing that it could go either way: perhaps I would get free of this pattern, perhaps I would not – it was in the hands of Divinity now.

Shortly after this, Amma did a Q&A with the retreat group outside, in the unseasonably hot evening sun. There were only about 500 of us there. Right from the beginning, I felt a large amount of fear and anxiety coursing through my system, to the point where I could barely sit still. I didn’t know why I was feeling this way, it was like a body thing. I decided to focus more intensely on the question that was happening, and on Amma’s answer. As I looked at Amma, she made a certain movement as she talked with her hands, and with that I was gone. I felt as if I was merging into Amma from where I was – it was part-visual, part-kinesthetic (akin to the way I sense, during a session). As this happened, any remaining sense of separation fell away and I began to cry. In this oneness and tears and the whole un-conveyable experience, I suddenly knew that all my desire, lack and longing for this person – and all women and men who I had ever felt that towards – was really the longing for God. I simply knew it. Not as a concept and not as a philosophy, and not as an excuse. I actually saw it. I saw it in such a way, that it felt like I could never actually un-see it. I also sensed intuitively that all my other desires were also the longing for God. I felt freed at last…….truly, truly free.

(NB God in my perception is also Truth, wholeness, unity, oneness etc.) The next thoughts were, “Why have I been running after men and women all this time?” and “How could I have missed this reality all these years?” Then the strangest thing happened: I experienced depression for the first time in my life. As I sat, purposefully alone, eating dinner, I felt depressed. But there was absolutely no resistance to it. The sense of oneness was so broad and pervasive, that there was absolutely no problem with feeling depressed. In fact, I was pleased to be having the experience, because before that I never understood what depression was. I knew what pain was, deep gruelling emotional pain, but I didn’t know depression until that moment. I then experienced suicidal ideation! But again, there was no problem with this either, because there was zero resistance to it. And it existed in a context of oneness, of Love. After about an hour, both of these so-called negative experiences passed of their own accord, without me doing anything at all about them.

In hindsight, I believe they occurred because my ego had just lost its trump card, which was the core love story drama. With that gone, it seems like it had to play the depression and suicide cards to try to regain ‘control’ of my bodymind. But that didn’t work: these feelings and thoughts simply passed through, as I said. So then I was just there: story-less and One, feeling a sense of ordinariness and freedom. Nothing special, yet complete liberation.

I make my newsletters personal because I don’t believe I can help unless I talk from my own direct experience. I hope that by reading this something may have resonated or sparked for you.

See you soon, after the retreat,

Love,

xDaisy

Out of the Blue

Hello,

First off I want to tell you about an upcoming training in the IAM, Amma’s meditation technique, which came to her in a vision while she was taking a nighttime stroll around the ashram many years ago. I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a way to connect with Divinity, a fantastic meditation technique or simply a way to unwind, calm thinking down or relax the nervous system. Whatever intention you bring to it, will gradually manifest in your life. It is being held in Brighton / Lewes on the 17th / 18th September. The cost to cover room hire etc. is £35; please contact me if you are interested.

My next recommendation is the Foundational Vortex Healing course being held here in London, 19th – 23rd September with Anthony Gorman. It is hard to begin to explain what Vortex Healing has brought into my life so far because it is so broad and deep. I was thinking recently about why I practice Vortex Healing more than the other helping modalities I am trained in. I came to the simple conclusion that, in my personal and professional experience, it is more effective at deepening you into the core of what you are and releasing the roots of what you aren’t, than any other modality of help I have trained in or experienced first hand.

Now back to the Amma tour this summer 🙂 It was interesting to hear Amma explain in an aside during one of her talks in L.A., that the external aspect of Kali – the fierce appearance – is designed to bring out the dormant doubt in the devotee. I immediately thought of those of you who have felt that Amma has glared at you or ignored you etc. over the years. If she is indeed an embodiment of Kali (which I personally believe), then this might help you make sense of what she is doing there. From my perspective, no action Amma makes is unconscious, and Yes – she can bestow focus on many many people at once. Anyone who has experienced the ‘staring Darshan’ at the end of Devi Bhava will know about this. When she is ‘Kali with us’, perhaps Amma is indeed purposefully bringing out the poison of doubt in the process of life and Divinity. If this kind of insecurity exists within in a suppressed state – for example, as cynicism – it gives rise to all kinds of distortions and disorders in the experience of living, not to mention in the body. On a similar note, it is not uncommon for people to not want to be with Amma if they have strong issues with their own mother. It is easy to put your birth mother’s face over Amma’s face, subtly and subconsciously projecting onto her. If you had painful childhood experiences, you may then fear that she will hurt you in some way, get angry with you, punish you for something you did or ignore you etc. If this sounds like you, you may even find that when you approach her for Darshan, that you have negative thoughts towards Amma. All of that is part of the process of you healing from things which are sometimes unimaginably deep in your system. It will not hurt Amma in any way. In fact, she has been known to ask us to project anger and negativity onto her using the Amma dolls, in order to release in a harmless way. It is possible to see at some point, that the thoughts you have towards Amma are really thoughts you harbour towards yourself.

On a different note, Amma is really urging us all to plant trees if possible, adding the chilling words that, “when we cut down trees, remember we are building our own coffin.” She is also encouraging anyone who has outside space to plant a small vegetable garden and try to eat the produce from that. This means we will not go hungry when food runs short in the future and we will also avoid consuming the pesticides etc. on supermarket vegetables. Not to mention that we save money and get in touch with the earth at the same time 🙂

Now for a little story 🙂 I had a profound experience of Divine Intention during this tour with Amma. Having something like that really changes your life, because before that the idea that the Divine can reach into your life and move it in a certain direction is often just that – an idea, perhaps a hope, or a dream. Here is what happened to me. Out-of-the-blue, during Devi Bhava in Toronto (the final stop on the tour), my boss told my friend and I to go and sit with Amma on the stage. We were understandably astonished, because this lady is known for wanting people to work very hard. We jumped at the chance and made our way onto the stage. We stood beside the ‘bouncer’, an entertaining yet stern man who always wears a suit, and manages the part of the stage nearest to Amma on all the US tour programs. Again out-of-the-blue, he invited us to sit together directly next to Amma. Let me explain that this never happens! It was really out of character for him. We felt so lucky, and beamed at one another 🙂 As I watched her up-close, each movement Amma made as she gave Darshan would bridge me deeper into presence… Then, she suddenly turned and looked at both of us directly, smiling. It was amazing… That look will never leave me. It was a look of the purest knowing… It was so rich, so full… Both my friend and I reported the same things: it felt like Amma was communicating that she herself had brought us into this tour on staff, and that this exchange with her was a kind of ‘graduation’. We both felt this deep sense of Amma acknowledging all the seva we had done, and of the inner work we had done and also we felt this incredible depth of solidarity between us. We felt as if Amma had given each one to the other to help us complete the tour. Somehow I knew, intuitively, that I had just had a real life experience of Divine Intention. And in the wake of that, doubt vanished. I wish I could put this all into words better. But maybe it isn’t possible to do that. The mystery manifesting into creation, manifesting in all kinds of ways, every moment… You can see why the wise men (and women) say, better to sit as silence.

I hope you enjoyed this email and that you are getting plenty of sun 🙂

Love,

Daisy

Why Amma?

Hello,

How are you Londoners and people of the world? 🙂 I hope if you are in London that you are enjoying this heat wave we are lucky enough to be having 🙂

I want to address a question today which people often ask me, or ask me without words. Why Amma? Why do I do this? Why go and pay a handsome fee to work without pay, under conditions which some would consider harsh?

The answer is simple: it’s love. I look at Amma, and I love her. The depth of that love makes me want to support her work, serve Embracing the World (her global charity), and beyond that, to serve life in its entirety. For me, it’s passion; it’s not a ‘being good’ thing. It’s not even spiritual. Imagine being in love…now times it by 500…that’s nowhere near it. This is bhakti (devotion) in real terms.

Everyone has their own particular relationship with Amma, and certainly Amma devotees are all there for different reasons. Some of my friends, clients and family feel put off by the culty appearance of it all, by some of the devotees (who can be far from loving) and by the pretentious ‘holier than thou’ dynamics. Those of you who know me even a little bit, know I am definitely not the poster girl for holiness 🙂 No; it’s a love thing. Pure and simple.

So, what were the physical realities of being on volunteer tour staff, you may wonder. In my particular seva, we were working around 14 hours per day (every day) and longer on a Devi Bhava (the all-nighter). We got roughly 5 hours sleep per night, on the floor, sharing a room and bathroom with between 6 and 40 women. Then, after the long Devi Bhava, we would get on a coach and travel to the next city. Some of those journeys were over 22 hours long. When we arrived, we would sometimes get only a few hours sleep before set-up and work began. We delivered programs in 10 cities, over a 6-week period.

In between all this, I would squeeze my way onto the stage to spend time with Amma. Occasionally, Amma would call the staff to receive Darshan. I would like to share with you my diary entry about this:-

6/6/16

I don’t know how possible it is to put this into words…

Impossible.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

But let me try.

Amma called us for Darshan in Seattle on Devi Bhava. As I entered the stage in the queue, I decided to make a prayer within. I said something like, ‘Amma, please assist me in focussing on the goal of this life: on realising God. Please help me to remain focussed even during this tour.’

As I laid my eyes upon her, hugging the person in front, tears welled up. I felt this love for her that was beyond anything I had ever experienced, and yet ordinarily human at the same time. I simply rejoiced within, at the sight of her. She moved my head around quite a bit before finally placing it on her heart, while she answered the questions of some devotees to her right. It always amazes me how one never feels left out in this scenario: Amma’s attention is deeply with each one of us simultaneously, which is testament to the sheer depth of oneness she is living. She then kissed my cheek and embraced me, chanting in my ear with a kind of vehemence in her voice, “My daughter! My daughter! My daughter!”, over and over again. I fell into total oneness…….. At the same time, the human being felt her as my teacher and as my mother – somewhere where those two are one and the same. And the experience of trust was overwhelming. As Amma finished the hug and handed me prasad, we drew back from one another and she looked deeply into my eyes. I cannot adequately express in words what I felt pass between us in that exchange: it was simply beyond the beyond. I then felt deep gratitude and expressed it somehow from oneness. Amma’s expression altered to one of such profound compassion….…something just too immense to convey. She embraced me again and then placed a chocolate in my mouth. That was the moment at which my searching gently stopped. My life’s search ceased in that moment. It was, perhaps, what many teachers have described as the end of seeking. Immediately after this I experienced true happiness: powerful, pure, authentic, unconditional happiness. I felt restored, redeemed – completely. There was total and utter wholeness. I’m not talking conceptually here, but actually. The real thing.

As I walked away, I collapsed on the stage in tears beside Amma. I was crying, and then I was sobbing; there was no way to do anything at all, and I couldn’t stop. But I was actually sobbing with happiness. My heart broke open under a force: that of revelation, unconditional happiness, union…Truth. Simultaneously, I experienced a spontaneous healing of my past, which came from nowhere. Dad’s death, the break-ups, the childhood trauma, the fear, isolation, despair, loss, loneliness, lack and doubt – all of these were consumed by something I cannot describe. I cried and cried, wiping my make-up from my face with my sleeve, only to cry uncontrollably again.

When the crying eventually stopped, I sat for a while. When I left the stage, I felt empty in the true sense of the word. Emptied of separation, of that heavy anxious burden. And the very subtle sense that something is missing, was gone. I could rest…finally, I could rest…… The feeling of resting and oneness were beautiful……profound. Paradoxically, there was an abundant feeling of vitality at the same time. But it was vitality without ownership. I realised that rest and vitality are the same thing. Eventually I went about the day, without saying a word about it to anyone.”

I hope you enjoy your day and that I get to see you soon 🙂

Love,

xDaisy

The End of the Film

Hello 🙂

How are you? I hope you are enjoying the Bank Holiday, and not working like my poor flatmate! I have decided to take tomorrow off in order to take proper care of myself before my move and big trip with Amma. My apologies to those of you who were waiting for this opportunity. There will be others once I get back (16th July). Obviously if you are in crisis, or even semi-crisis, do call me. I will be available until Friday, and then contactable sporadically by email while away.

I want to share with you a couple of interesting sessions which happened during the past week. I had the opportunity to work with someone who had not experienced healing before, which was an honour and a joy. She was naturally sensitive to Vortex and I felt the session went very deep, which was confirmed by what she said when she eventually came round. She said she was amazed to be able to “feel something so palpably that is simply energy”. This is something I forget nowadays because I am used to it: how incredible it is that simply channelling Vortex Healing can create this type of tangible effect on a person. She wrote to me the next day: “Thank you for such a magical experience. I felt so held and safe. Like I was truly blessed.”

I was also fortunate enough to do a session on a client who reminded me of me some years ago, which was a sweetness on a personal level 🙂 One of the things that was similar between us, was that she was crying and almost hyper-ventilating with a fear release during most of the session, yet she had the courage and the trust to keep going in anyway. That was me when I got into Vortex – every time I experienced the energy, I would react like this. I was able to see a good amount of detail about what the issue was for this person, and the childhood experiences that had concreted it. Afterwards, I was actually shocked by what she said and the way she said it. She exclaimed, “I was in so much pain! I’ve been in a serious car accident before and I wasn’t in as much pain as that.” Thankfully she had already intuited that this was a good thing in terms of her healing process. Bear in mind I was not using any bodywork, or therapy, in this session: my client’s response was purely due to the density of the underlying root conditioning breaking out from her.

It is sometimes hard for people to believe it could be true that even physical pain is not really rooted in the physical body. Perhaps it is simply too threatening for some to entertain the idea that the wild torrents of the inner landscape with which we are all in touch (to some degree or another), the subtle bodies and the unknown itself, could be the true origin of the suffering we experience on any and every level. But what would such a person conclude if they were actually watching the above session unfold..? It is an interesting question.

I had the pleasure of talking with two friends about awakening yesterday, one at lunchtime and one at nighttime. Lucky me! In the first conversation, my friend and I were talking about what it meant to us to ‘want awakening’ before it happened. For both of us, it wasn’t something that we knew really; it was something much more subtle than that. And yet this subtle unknown curious sense burned and resonated within each of us. And somehow, we both found ourselves waking up young and before almost everyone around us. We shared that awakening is not a game – there’s no game there, no map or gain – there’s no point to it basically. Even the word awakening is misleading in a way. We went on to say that, as human beings, we all do what we love: we are into what we are into, and that’s simply that. In reality, nothing ‘gets you there’ – gets you interested or engaged or involved or awake, if you are not already into it. It’s not a progressive thing – like a hobby, or a career, or a soulmate connection, or climbing the spiritual ladder. It’s nothing like that. It’s so simple…so simple, and so unfrilly.

In the other conversation, I was speaking to a friend and saying that once you have this insight, life is kind of over – and at such a young age. Lol! And yet, some part of the ego can still hold on all over again and think there is something still to get or gain. I said to him, “It’s like if I gave you a DVD and then told you what happens at the end. If you were sensible, you would put the DVD down and walk out of the room. There’s nothing in it for you now you know the ending. But I bet you would watch the film anyway, just for the drama leading up to it?” He laughed in agreement and added, “Yes. It’s like after you really experience what’s real, you know that all desires are really the desire for that. So they seem transparent – fake almost – and it’s pointless to try to fulfil them in a way. Because now you know the ending. Plus that end is here and now – it’s here already.”

I’ll leave you with that. If I don’t get the chance to say it again before I go, then thank you for being such wonderful clients 🙂 I will see you very soon – in July,

Love,

xDaisy